hmmmm

[gemmy]

So, just a curiosity....

Why is it then that only the women post photos of themselves and the men, especially 'Dom's' don't? All that confidence, self-assurance and all, would have one believe it shouldn't be that big a deal, and yet....

hmmmmm

[kuriousnature]

you make a very interesting point... i was wondering that too... there are many female sub pics... i would like to see some male Dom pics!

[cadence]

I saw a picture of Oz's foot once, but I think that was because he forgot to move it back.

It is true, most Dominants don't show thier pics, unless you count Tom of Sweeden, now that was a picture.

Maybe they want us to use our imagination more, isn't that what Dominants want most of the time anyway?

[ashtonDs]

Originally posted by cadence:
Maybe they want us to use our imagination more, isn't that what Dominants want most of the time anyway?

...or maybe they're afraid of what you would think of them if you knew how they looked. lol

[gemmy]

...or maybe they're afraid of what you would think of them if you knew how they looked. lol

but then doesn't that shatter the whole "I am Dom, hear me Roar" confidence we're supposed to believe in regardless?

and ummmm, really - it's the subs with the confidence issues and yet here we are posting numerous photos anyway - makes a gurl really really contemplate that whole 'confidence' thing

[steelish]

but then doesn't that shatter the whole "I am Dom, hear me Roar" confidence we're supposed to believe in regardless?

and ummmm, really - it's the subs with the confidence issues and yet here we are posting numerous photos anyway - makes a gurl really really contemplate that whole 'confidence' thing

I've been thinking about that as well! Maybe they think that we women visualize big strong muscular men sweeping us off our feet and having their way with us. (makes them nervous that they can't live up to the fantasy?)

[Chuckdom19]

*ahem* some of we Doms (us Doms? whatever) DO have our pictures on our profiles, just not as avatars. It is much more fun to require our subs to post pics than it is to post our own, as all women are beautifully different, and most male faces are just boring. Might be my genetic bias there, not sure.

[gemmy]

*ahem* some of we Doms (us Doms? whatever) DO have our pictures on our profiles, just not as avatars. It is much more fun to require our subs to post pics than it is to post our own, as all women are beautifully different, and most male faces are just boring. Might be my genetic bias there, not sure.

I don't buy it at all, sorry lol (maybe a male face isn't boring to us just as you think all women are beautiful?)

If the 'all fearing confidence' that all subs are supposed to believe in is there, what's the issue?

And to Steelish, then doesn't that make them 'insecure'?

[cadence]

but then doesn't that shatter the whole "I am Dom, hear me Roar" confidence we're supposed to believe in regardless?

and ummmm, really - it's the subs with the confidence issues and yet here we are posting numerous photos anyway - makes a gurl really really contemplate that whole 'confidence' thing

...or maybe they're afraid of what you would think of them if you knew how they looked. lol

hmmmm, now you have made me think more about this. I know when I first saw a picture of my owner, I thought damn it, you do not look like the sadistic bastard I thought you would be. He looked way too sweet, he even has dimples!(thank god he's too busy too show up and see this)
Maybe it is the "I am Dom, hear me Roar confidence" , they have an image to uphold.
I have more on this, but I need to think about it first.

[DowntownAmber]

The nature of being a submissive is to be the one who is enjoyed by our Dominant; whether that enjoyment be gleaned from what we do, or say, or how we look and present ourselves. I would suspect most subs post thier pics to please the Doms they have currently or the ones they hope to attract. We aim to please by our natures. On the other hand, the Doms are there to enjoy us. Who are they really trying to impress?

[Ozme52]

I saw a picture of Oz's foot once, but I think that was because he forgot to move it back.

Impressive wasn't it....

[Ozme52]

Okay... Be warned. Sit down and prepare yourself.... and try not to swoon.

This is why we are so careful with our images.

---------------------

I guess you'll have to wait afterall, based on subsequent commentary about posting it in the self-portrait thread...

and...

though there was only a square inch of skin showing... the motorcycle was quite identifiable...

[yourlilslave86]

you know ..when i joined the site ..i put up a picture i took and left it up as my avi till just very recently....what i hear the most when i started talking to Doms is do you have more pictures? or do you have a cam....and when i ask them back the answer is no...

Reign has shown me several pictures and i have taken pictures that he has requested..maybe it is that one on one thing that makes it more easier to share pictures.

i am not sure who i was talking to last week but they had told me they didnt want their pictures travelling all over the internet and i can understand that completely.

[thrall]

HHHMMM


OK……..hard copy…….a very bad subject with me!

I think that the “have no pics” people….have learned something valuable……They know that pics can come back and bite you on the ass. They have better self esteem; there is no need to parade like a peacock. They value a future other then the now. They are for the most part…..not stupid or careless with pics of themselves.

Once your image is out.......its wildlife on the web......forever!

I think asking/requiring a sub to post explicit and non explicit pics on the web, is down right shameful and wrong. These Doms are not looking out for the safety or future of their subs. They are looking to stroke their vanity at the price of someone else. Yes it may be amusing now…..but how will that sub feel about those pics a few years down the line.

Many who post pics are very young and looking for attention, and sad to say this is a way to get it….but at what price?

There are many here who like to post pics of themselves. For themselves and by themselves… if that is what they want to do….. great. I just think its…..not the greatest idea going.

Ok….and then there is the idea that good deal of the men try and float……..lmao ……Im still waiting to see the pic of a man who has a cock like Godzilla’s tail!........lmao

[Rowen]

HHHMMM


OK……..hard copy…….a very bad subject with me!

I think that the “have no pics” people….have learned something valuable……They know that pics can come back and bite you on the ass. They have better self esteem; there is no need to parade like a peacock. They value a future other then the now. They are for the most part…..not stupid or careless with pics of themselves.

Once your image is out.......its wildlife on the web......forever!

I think asking/requiring a sub to post explicit and non explicit pics on the web, is down right shameful and wrong. These Doms are not looking out for the safety or future of their subs. They are looking to stroke their vanity at the price of someone else. Yes it may be amusing now…..but how will that sub feel about those pics a few years down the line.

Many who post pics are very young and looking for attention, and sad to say this is a way to get it….but at what price?

There are many here who like to post pics of themselves. For themselves and by themselves… if that is what they want to do….. great. I just think its…..not the greatest idea going.

Ok….and then there is the idea that good deal of the men try and float……..lmao ……Im still waiting to see the pic of a man who has a cock like Godzilla’s tail!........lmao

thrall, as always, has a point here. I mailed several times with Slut Linda and her mistress because of my worries (and still do..). However they had a point too, taking care to prevent to easy recognition by hiding the face (well that is the intention..but one can slip on that one too..yaiks!) making the risks almost theoretical...and yes..risk does add to the excitement, no denying that.

There are other sites, like the adultism one where Slut Linda is exposed as well. And I am astonished about the load of pics and vids on which people show themselves, completely.. I know, it IS exciting, and we think it is a tolerant society...but what if your coworker finds you there and decides to mail those pics to the rest of the company???? And those blackmail stories, they are exciting (well, to me anyway..yummy!) but for real???

So...if you wanna post pics..at least prevent a too easy recognition.. A pic like your crotch with his/her name on it, or some other body part with clamps etc. is exciting/humiliating enough by itself, showing you have done as ordered. It doesn't need your face or tattoo in it...

Also agree that a Dom should take care on that aspect as well, and even if the sub wants to expose completely, the Dom should strongly advise against it, certainly not encourage it. [/B]

[claire]

Many who post pics are very young and looking for attention, and sad to say this is a way to get it….but at what price?
[/B]

As one who posted my pictures and is definitely not young, I can say Thrall is right. I did it because I am dying for attention. If a co-worker sees it, so what! Then they have to admit they were looking.

As for the guys - even hunky Tom didn't show below the waist.

[Rowen]

As one who posted my pictures and is definitely not young, I can say Thrall is right. I did it because I am dying for attention. If a co-worker sees it, so what! Then they have to admit they were looking.

As for the guys - even hunky Tom didn't show below the waist.

Well...I did..though not here..LOL..but to mistress..yes..

[thepast]

Speaking from some... experience... in cyber-imagery and ninja skills (ty Widget)...

I will just re-iterate what a few have already said: THINK BEFORE YOU POST!!!!! This site, like ALL others, is on the INTERNET. Yes folks, that means a quick check to Google and viola, there you are (by the way, if you have an "unusual" scene name, you might want to periodically Google yourself anyway, just to see what's out there)--right out there for the world to see.

People that you don't want to know, people who have vendettas against you, or just totally creepy people, can see your picture. If you have kids, do you want them "accidently stumbling" across your naked pictures? What about your parents? Your co-workers? If you don't care, then by all means, post away! But folks, it isn't just the nude pictures that are "problematic."

For all of you posting up your face--people now can link your face with your scene nick & whamo, there they go, off to the races. And if you say "Well, then they have to admit they were on the site too," not necessarily! The way the net works, you definitely do NOT have to be logged into this site to see pics, nor other sites to see other pics.

Blacking out/smudging a face isn't going to cut it--there are enough identifiable characteristics of someone in most pictures to figure out who they are. Your entire head is still there--your facial structure, your hair color...

...and look at the background of the photo--is there anything there that could give it away? If someone knew you already, would there be enough in the pic for them to tell it's you?

Another issue is posting a pic w/other people in it: if you don't have their consent, why are you posting it? Assumingly, these are people you know (I am talking about self-portraits here) so why on EARTH would you post them onto this site w/o consent?

If you have children and/or are married... come on, don't be naive. Your hubby/wife either knows you're here & doesn't care, or once they find out they will be livid. And they WILL find out--they always do (I have about 20 test cases to tell you about on that one)... do you want them to be able to log in & match your pic to a nick? Would you want your 15-17yr old son to be able to see your face on here?

Avatars are great. They are fantastic. It's fun to see breasts, asses, etc. But beyond that... think realllllly hard about posting ANYTHING on any site, including this one. The self-portrait area contains an amazing amount of pics that could be ID'd. Or, people post non-identifiable pics there, but then put their face into their profile, or have pics in their photo album. Trust me, people will find the pics & will out you--people are like that.

Now, if you don't care, or you are completely out to your family, friends, and occupation, then hey, I say go for it. Maybe you are a porn star, or have your own naughty little website... then hey, post away.

Best advice? Better safe then sorry!! Keep your pics to you & yours, and put up an avi on the site that represents you. Or, if you want to put yourself up, put up a nice red arse, or a nice set of breasts, or, if you are male, a gorgeous cock.


Better safe then sorry, better overly cautious then regretful...

[thrall]

woohoo!....thank you Delia!

[claire]

Good reminder Delia for those of us who get a little too care free.

[cadence]

To be honest I was only referring to the bits and peices of Dominants. I'd prefer to see some bums. I like looking at a man's ass.
Oh and someone please get to Oz's attachment, I want to see!!!

But I wholly agree with what Delia has said. If you are comfortable enough to show your face that is your perogative. Sometimes people don't realize that even though they feel a sense of security within a place on the web, that security is not guaranteed.

I post a lot of pictures at the academy, and even then I have had some trolls tell me they have downloaded them onto thier computer, so after that they could be posted anywhere. Hence the fact I will never show my face or show anything that may give me away. Even though I try to be careful, I am probably not careful enough, but that is the risk I take and I am fully aware of what could happen.

Even if you play on cam the other person can take pictures of you without you even knowing it. So there is also that to be careful of.


I have been threatened once, by a Dominant, who said he would track down my email address and find me. And yes it can be done. I took the threat seriously enough when he tracked me down here. And that was all because I wouldn't meet him to play.
So yes there are some people who are not respectful of others and there are ways to find a person.
It's not only pictures, if you give out too much information about where you live and what type of job you do, you may inadvertently give out too much information in that regard. There are only a very few people I trust who know my real name and where I live. I trust them not to give out my information, and I respect thier's as well.

I definately do not use the same email or messenger with my close friends and family, that I use for BDSM sites. I keep those two separate.

[thrall]

Hard copy!........a very bad thing.


Now lets think.....There is a thread that is very popular here for the pics that it contains.......and where do you think they all come from??..Riped, downloaded, borrowed, shared, copied. Do you really think all of the people in the pics......know that they are here for everyone to enjoy???

In the blink of an eye........a keystroke, your image is no longer your own.

[thepast]

chuckles... if Oz moves his pic to the self-portraits area, it will be automatically approved. smiles... pics (I believe) are only allowed in these threads if they have to do w/thread content, which, though arguably Oz in his black leathers does, it isn't technically the right area for it... Probably why it hasn't been approved *smiles*

[cadence]

chuckles... if Oz moves his pic to the self-portraits area, it will be automatically approved. smiles... pics (I believe) are only allowed in these threads if they have to do w/thread content, which, though arguably Oz in his black leathers does, it isn't technically the right area for it... Probably why it hasn't been approved *smiles*

lol, I have been here long enough, I should realistically know the rules, but I got all excited. I'll contain it now, and hope the picture gets moved, because now that's unecessary teasing.


We should get this post back on track though.

I am still curious as to why Dominants don't show any pictures at all, is it because they don't feel that need to.
Are Dominants just not exhibitionists as submissives are more inclined to be?

[thrall]

HHHmmm....

Could it be that they are..........smart, cautious, and know the risks????

Could it be that the saying "Do as i say and don't do as i do" is a rule they live by??..

Could it be that they have respect for themselves??

Could it be that they are not who they claim to be??

[Rowen]

I think thrall & delia do have their points as said before. I won't repeat them because the point is made, and I also did a thread on it.
Did a google btw, and Rowen has over 1,5 million hits..making it a bit hard to find this particular Rowen. The MTP however brings it down to only a 1000, one them being here! So, glad the MTP will be gone soon. Also will bring this thread under attention of my playmates

Then again..a certain risk seems uninevitable.. I mean, if people really want, they can track my IPadress, in Europe a copy of every mail is saved for over a year (because we are all potential criminals) Meaning if "they" really want..
Still, that is a small risk and indeed adds a bit to the exitement Also, most of the things I've written here, people may read it. (have asked on to be removed tho)
Yes, some of it will be embarrassing at times...but let's face it, when a roleplay goes wrong or people walk in on that (it did happen once to me and my GF!) that is embarrassing too. And your playpartner taking pics while you are blindfolded...it can happen.

BTW..seems to me doms simply can be more picky..I have the impression that there are way more submissives than doms - but I can be mistaken on that.

But..for the last time.. don't make it too easy..there are people out there who enjoy hurting you. It can happen even when you are cautious, but don't present them your head on a silver plate!

[gemmy]

HHHmmm....

Could it be that they are..........smart, cautious, and know the risks????

Could it be that the saying "Do as i say and don't do as i do" is a rule they live by??..

Could it be that they have respect for themselves??

Could it be that they are not who they claim to be??

Yes, I do understand the risks completely and always have but am I to think then from your statement thrall that I have NO respect for myself because I've posted pictures? Or anyone else who has, for their own reasons, posted their photos? Nice!

[gemmy]

you know ..when i joined the site ..i put up a picture i took and left it up as my avi till just very recently....what i hear the most when i started talking to Doms is do you have more pictures? or do you have a cam....and when i ask them back the answer is no...

Reign has shown me several pictures and i have taken pictures that he has requested..maybe it is that one on one thing that makes it more easier to share pictures.

i am not sure who i was talking to last week but they had told me they didnt want their pictures travelling all over the internet and i can understand that completely.

Exactly!

[Rowen]

Yes, I do understand the risks completely and always have but am I to think then from your statement thrall that I have NO respect for myself because I've posted pictures? Or anyone else who has, for their own reasons, posted their photos? Nice!

I don't think thrall intended to offend you or anybody else. However, we must not forget that on many pics humiliation, exposure, degradation is an issue...perhaps the main issue.

[cadence]

HHHmmm....

Could it be that they are..........smart, cautious, and know the risks????

Could it be that the saying "Do as i say and don't do as i do" is a rule they live by??..

No I wouldn't think so. Some have thier submissives post pictures, so why would they put someone else they should care about at risk. I don't think they would be that beligerent.

The do as I say part I understand, but I highly doubt that they use the don't do as I do rule.
I am required to post pictures when asked, because I am told to do it. He doesn't post pictures. I am also required to at least know the risks I take when I do post a picture and ensure my safety, but that is up to me to know that, not for him to remind me of it. Just because I am required to do something, does not make it a free for all.

Could it be that they have respect for themselves??

I would think that we all have respect for ourselves, so I am a bit confused by what you mean. And as to what Rowen said, regardless if it is humiliating, if you like it, how can you have zero respect for yourself?
I just read Thrall's previous answer, and now I understand what she means now.
But we also make choices as well, and as long as we are safe in doing so, I don't see the harm done. I am still respected and respect myself with whatever choices I make. I understand the implications that may happen with my pictures, I fully know what can happen to them. I have made my choice though, and I stick by it.

Could it be that they are not who they claim to be??

Well there is always going to be that group of people. Even submissives can do that. I don't expect a Dominant to start posting pictures to prove he is who he is.
I also won't share a picture or expect one, if I don't know them well enough.