I am well aware that there were previous parts and that they described the people involved. My comments stand as stated. It's the beginning of a new chapter -- it's easier on the reader to set things up more clearly in the first paragraph. Clearer writing will never hurt your cause.

But this is the second time I've posted feedback for you only to have it deflected. If you want to post stories for your fans and you think you don't require feedback, I'll be happy to move your postings to the "Stories" forum. Or you can post directly to the Library itself.

This forum is for feedback requested and gratefully accepted.