For me, it's an in the bedroom thing pretty much entirely. BDSM to me is sexual. Not always sex, but at least sexual.
I sometimes don't need orgasm tied in with the rest of the activites, especially when there's a good spanking involved, that tends to leave me feeling pretty much finished off, but generally BDSM and sex are intertwined.
I have little to no interest in any D/s activities outside of sex. Trying to get non-sexual submission out of me might get someone kicked. Or atleast glared at.