Keep looking and don't give up, you'll find what you're searching for.

The old saying, "you have to kiss a lot of toads", is even more true trying to find a D/s relationship than traditional, I think. And especially true for submissives -- I never have understood the dearth of good dominants out there. But if you keep looking you'll find someone who understands the need to let you move into the relationship at a reasonable pace and isn't just looking for sex.

Wait for someone who understands that each step, from email to chat to cam to meeting to scene, is a gift you give and not theirs by right of the mail-order riding crop they bought.