Quote Originally Posted by DowntownAmber View Post
Directing her to the story section of this site can also be helpful to gague what she likes or to hint to her as to what you like.

When J and I first got together, it was in a good ol' vanilla r/l sense first (as opposed to the Lifestyle based relationships that a site like this often spawns). We both sensed that the other was inclined to play in a more BDSM related way, but neither of us had figured out a way to come right out and talk about it. It can be scary, as you well know. One day we were chatting on IM and he asked what I was doing. I said I was reading stories online and sent him the link to the Library section of this site. Within a few days I was tied up on the living room floor and things have been progressing nicely since then.

Good luck!

This was very true...I suspected but wasn't sure. Please understand however once I was aware of this interest in Amber that too that opened a whole other can of questions for me. How kinky does she want to get...holy cow does she want me to beat her bloody? Piss on her? Crap in her face? Frankly allot of stuff I was not interested in? We really had to talk about where this thing was going to go and what each of us was into. This whole process really added to the excitement of the situation for a while! There is a BDSM questionnaire floating around this site somewhere that really helped once we were both "out" and talking about things.
But listen if you love this woman, and I’m assuming she feels the same way, you have time, take it slow ease her into it. Oddly what I’ve learned and quite frankly love about my Dom position is that is requires a large degree of cherishing Amber. To me this is the core of the Dom. Lifestyle or vanilla most women like the idea of being cherished, told they are beautiful, sexy etc. Do this in control, while taking control, say by tying her in a sexy Karata or cuffing her to a post and I think you will be surprised at how receptive she is to your dominant nature. Once that line is crossed push gently to the next.
Remember she fell in love with your personality, which I would suspect is at some lever fairly dominant, so my guess is she already suspects.