Certain people bring out my submissive side

[Hime]

Yep. I'm a switch, myself. Some people make me feel like running and fetching things for them, and some people make me feel like smacking them on the ass. I'm not always sure what it is about a person that makes me feel that way. It doesn't necessarily mean that I like that person more than I like someone who only attracts me in a vanilla way, but I have decided after a lot of soul-searching that I'm only going to do BDSM with people who really attract me either as a sub or a dom. Life is too short to fake interest in something that isn't working for me.

I would emphatically second Oz's advice to think about polyamory. Especially since you're bi, poly is a great way to explore different areas of sexual interest while still sharing a special bond with your partner. Since he hasn't had a chance to explore a lot of his sexuality, it might be good for him to explore, too.

If you have any questions about what that could mean for your relationship, feel free to ask me about anything. It's all about being informed and making the choice that's right for you.

[thir]

Yep. I'm a switch, myself. Some people make me feel like running and fetching things for them, and some people make me feel like smacking them on the ass. I'm not always sure what it is about a person that makes me feel that way. It doesn't necessarily mean that I like that person more than I like someone who only attracts me in a vanilla way

I would emphatically second Oz's advice to think about polyamory.

I have the same experience that some people pull at one side, and other people at the other side. Gender is unimportant. With the people who generate this 'pull' in me bdsm is effortless in many ways.

I would also like to tell you that I had the same problem a number of years ago. I awoke to some strong bdsm urges during a relationship, and my partner did try to experiment a bit, but could not find anything of interest in it. We agreed that I could find me a person to fulfil that special need, as long as this was not a threat to the original relationship. It worked for about 4 years, with two partners both of which accepted each other.