Of course it is possible and no it’s not too much to ask for, in fact I would think it’s preferred.

I’ve never had any long term r/l relationship where it wasn't the norm really.

In fact, most of my interactions online have also involved a lot of general talking etc.

To be honest it sounds like you may have been spending too much time on role-play centered chat sites that promote degrading toy play or something along those lines.

I recommend you participate here for a while and talk to some of us in chat who are not here just to get our jollies and maybe go to a local munch or too.