conditioning for orgasm on command

[Lisais mine]

I am really proud of my girl- she got to the point today that she can cum just by my voice. I would like to hear about others who have done this, and share methods.

My method starts with sexualization. I have my sub masturbate every day, in the shower. this goes on for a few weeks. I also say the word (CUM!) every time she cums in front of me, telling her she is a good girl for cumming.

after a few weeks, I then use orgasm restriction to re-inforce the command. after not cumming at all for a day or so, she is allowed to orgasm many times, each time with me saying CUM!

now comes the next stage. I forbid the sub from climaxing when I cannot hear. and each time she cums, I use the word again, reinforcing with praise.

now, when she is excited, i begin to say Cum Before she does. at some point, she will cum from me saying it. then without hands. more praise.

now comes a test. I make her cum when she cannot touch herself (like in the car at a red light, while she is driving) by telling her to.

[his_pet {MM}]

My Master is training me in a similar way...Im getting there but I still need a little stimulation to follow through.

Good luck with your girl Sir...

[BryansGrrrl]

I wanted to add my thoughts here. I believe Adriana summed it up for me in another post elsewhere.

I am now actively participating in my own conditioning. We have talked and I understand what Mia'Cova is trying to accomplish, and so I not only do the things because he asks them of me, but because I understand what he's trying to do when he asks them. And I want to achieve those goals. So, I comply because I love him and I want us to work together.

Thank you for the training, Love. I hope I continue to please you every day.

[Ozme52]

What appalls me about this... is the number of subs who don't believe this is possible.

My approach utilizes the creation of the same conditioned responses, I forego the restrictions. Instead, I over stimulate and task my girl with many many orgasms. She must masturbate to just short of orgasm and hold herself there while she counts outloud, 10, 20, 30 seconds, legs trembling with the need to cum, and then she must cum on the count of 5. She must scream my name, imagining me watching as she comes.

Other times I get her hot and bothered online, and leave her the task of cumming 3-5 times in the next 5 minutes.

While initially she believed these goals impossible, she soon learned they were easy to attain... because it pleases me to know she is writhing in her bed or on the chair or in the shower...

I often request/expect an audio recording of the session be sent to me. Initially it embarrasses, but the desire to excel performing for me soon adds to the conditioning process.

When we meet in-the-flesh, we will play both hard and soft, but strewn throughout the days, I will whisper in her ear to cum... and there is indeed nothing sweeter than to see her eyes go round as her body responds, (I do seem to have excellent timing.)

At least one night I will have her tied while we sleep, including a crotch rope. (BTW, I highely recommend this if you enjoy the gentle motions a stimulated sub induces by your side, into the mattress. But I digress...) During the night, I whisper into her ear; my name, obedience, little nothings reminding her how horny the rope makes her. If at any point her eyes flutter open, I immediately order her, with a hard commanding voice, to cum... and she does.

By week end, her body does truly belong to me.

[Pearlgem]

*sigh*

[Zarine13]

Are you sure you don't have a twin out there?

[Lisais mine]

What appalls me about this... is the number of subs who don't believe this is possible.

At least one night I will have her tied while we sleep, including a crotch rope. (BTW, I highely recommend this if you enjoy the gentle motions a stimulated sub induces by your side, into the mattress. But I digress...) During the night, I whisper into her ear; my name, obedience, little nothings reminding her how horny the rope makes her. If at any point her eyes flutter open, I immediately order her, with a hard commanding voice, to cum... and she does.

By week end, her body does truly belong to me.

heh- I'll try the rope thing as soon as i get a chance....

[cadence]

What appalls me about this... is the number of subs who don't believe this is possible.

It shouldn't appall you, because it really does seem like an impossible feat in the mind of a person who can't quite figure it out, and who has never tried it.

I at first didn't believe it was possible to do, but enough people have posted for me to believe it does happen.
I may have a hard time with it since I don't really understand what kind of orgasm the submissive is having.
I only know one type of orgasm. When I orgasm it's stimulated clitorilly (sp?), and I have never experienced any other type beyond that, unless you count the few wet dreams I have had. I have felt good other ways, but have never had an orgasm any other way.
My orgasms are in fact very hard and very long. They are so intense the first time, I normally won't finish it.
It becomes a struggle to have any more than two in a row, and it takes longer each time.
So I kind of wonder, how it is possible for someone like myself to have an orgasm from words, or I may be very selfish and enjoy the ones I do have.


Is it just the fluttery feeling you get? I get that a lot, I don't call them orgasms.

[Pearlgem]

What cadence said

[Veralynne]

I am really interested in this topic. I love the idea of orgasm training, but I don't know how much I believe in it. Personally, my Master has ordered me to cum on command, but it's only been after some buildup and with stimulation. I mean... I can get get aroused immediately by my Master speaking to me... but I am skeptical of the possibility of actually *orgasming* with no stimulation. Oz- do you think you could actually ejaculate with no stimulation? Getting hard.. sure...

Add to this the overwhelming propensity of females to fake orgasms... I don't know. Every female I've ever been friends with/talked to, has admitted to faking it at times. I know that's not an entirely related topic, but I could imagine in a situation where you thought it would be impossible to please your Master otherwise that you would do it. And before any guys get huffy that they would "know", I've never met a man that thought a chick they had been with faked it (when I knew them to have), and I'm quite sure no one I ever faked it with knows that I did.

Buuut... I suppose I should caveat that, all the times I had faked it were not in a full BDSM relationship, and perhaps the only reason I felt it necessary to do so was because I was with men that didn't fully understand my sexual needs/desires. For my own sake, I'd love it to be possible to cum on command without stimulation, etc. In my relationship with my Master, I am more sexually fulfilled and satisfied than I ever have been... and have found it much easier to orgasm. As our relationship continues my opinions on the subject may change, and I will be interested to see what is possible for me with training. Assuming that that ever even becomes a part of my life with my Master. If so- Pearlgem, cadence, I will try to keep you up to date on whether I think this is possible... from the skeptic's point of view ;-)

[Zarine13]

It shouldn't appall you, because it really does seem like an impossible feat in the mind of a person who can't quite figure it out, and who has never tried it.

I at first didn't believe it was possible to do, but enough people have posted for me to believe it does happen.
I may have a hard time with it since I don't really understand what kind of orgasm the submissive is having.
I only know one type of orgasm. When I orgasm it's stimulated clitorilly (sp?), and I have never experienced any other type beyond that, unless you count the few wet dreams I have had. I have felt good other ways, but have never had an orgasm any other way.
My orgasms are in fact very hard and very long. They are so intense the first time, I normally won't finish it.
It becomes a struggle to have any more than two in a row, and it takes longer each time.
So I kind of wonder, how it is possible for someone like myself to have an orgasm from words, or I may be very selfish and enjoy the ones I do have.


Is it just the fluttery feeling you get? I get that a lot, I don't call them orgasms.

This! Exactly this!

(yay! I'm not alone)

[Pearlgem]

As our relationship continues my opinions on the subject may change, and I will be interested to see what is possible for me with training. Assuming that that ever even becomes a part of my life with my Master. If so- Pearlgem, cadence, I will try to keep you up to date on whether I think this is possible... from the skeptic's point of view ;-)

That's all we need, Veralynne; the dirty little secrets from a former (whenever that may be) sceptic. Thanks x x

[Pearlgem]

PS Can you condition/train yourself to orgasm on your own command, anyone? How cool would that be!

[BryansGrrrl]

Honestly, I was skeptical too. And here is what happens to me when He commands, your mileage may vary:

First, I have to be aroused as of now for it to happen at all. He can say the word during normal conversation as a command, and I'll get that "fluttery feeling" but it doesn't have the same impact. Perhaps I will overcome (ha!) this in the future.

Second, the feeling is different from a "normal" orgasm. I too, have very hard orgasms when clitorally stimulated and this is not like that at all. It is only with Him that I have ever had an orgasm from straight intercourse, without the clitoral stimulation, so perhaps that helped to pave the way for this conditioning. That type of orgasm is different, it feels deeper... not centered in one spot like a clitoral orgasm, if you see my meaning.

The Cum on Command orgasm (for me) is more of a tensing sensation. My entire abdomen tenses, then the shuddering happens, and then the tiny bit of release. It is not the same as a penetration or a clitorial orgasm at all. But it is certainly a stronger sensation than the "fluttery" feeling.

I hope this helps. It is certainly a different experience.

My suggestion is to keep on working WITH the stimulation. Have your Master tell you to cum while S/He's stimulating you, or if you are on the phone, while you're stimulating yourself. Do this as often as you can.

Another thing that helped me alot, was when He told me I could NOT cum unless He could hear me. *sigh* So, I got VERY conditioned to His voice. If I was about to cum I'd beg him to "Tell me!" so that I could hear His voice as I did. (Actually, I still do this. If we are having phone sex I will beg Him to tell me to cum. I find it difficult to climax without His voice now, unless I'm using a vibrator, which I do not always do.) I participated in my own conditioning in this way.

Then one day, after a marathon phone sex session I had already cum from stimulation and His voice, and He said it again.... and it just happened!

[Mistress Annabelle]

What an intreguing notion - I am quite curious.
So simply, by those steps?

How brilliant!
Sir, I salute you.

[Lisais mine]

What an intreguing notion - I am quite curious.
So simply, by those steps?

How brilliant!
Sir, I salute you.

thank you, thank you. *bows*
yep, that is all i did. but you have to use a commanding voice. no other tone seems to work

[MrDom]

well my pet is also trained too cum on command. the word is cum now. i have made her cum in my wonderful places i choose. she also thought that was impossible but now she beleive's now lol. now soon i will be doing the same thing soon with her peeing on command that will diffently be fum lol.

[Ozme52]

Oz- do you think you could actually ejaculate with no stimulation? Getting hard.. sure...

No, I couldn't, but I'm not submissive and not prone to that kind of conditioning.

And... that said, I have no experience in the conditioning of men, so that would be a question better asked of a domme or a submissive man.

[Ozme52]

Add to this the overwhelming propensity of females to fake orgasms... I don't know. Every female I've ever been friends with/talked to, has admitted to faking it at times. I know that's not an entirely related topic, but I could imagine in a situation where you thought it would be impossible to please your Master otherwise that you would do it. And before any guys get huffy that they would "know", I've never met a man that thought a chick they had been with faked it (when I knew them to have), and I'm quite sure no one I ever faked it with knows that I did.

Buuut... I suppose I should caveat that, all the times I had faked it were not in a full BDSM relationship, and perhaps the only reason I felt it necessary to do so was because I was with men that didn't fully understand my sexual needs/desires. For my own sake, I'd love it to be possible to cum on command without stimulation, etc. In my relationship with my Master, I am more sexually fulfilled and satisfied than I ever have been... and have found it much easier to orgasm. As our relationship continues my opinions on the subject may change, and I will be interested to see what is possible for me with training. Assuming that that ever even becomes a part of my life with my Master. If so- Pearlgem, cadence, I will try to keep you up to date on whether I think this is possible... from the skeptic's point of view ;-)

As you say, in a vanilla context I'm sure it happens all the time... but in the context of a bdsm relationship, when the submissive is truly giving herself over to her dominant, it's far more likely to be the real mccoy.

My suggestion is never give in to faking it... and you will indeed be rewarded by that most surprising verbal orgasm.

[Ozme52]

Is it just the fluttery feeling you get? I get that a lot, I don't call them orgasms.

Perhaps if he was there whispering in your ear, urging you on, and on and on, that flutter would grow to a full on orgasmic spasm.

You might be all primed for it already...

It takes a "practiced eye" to see that moment and to be able to take advantage of it.

Like playing an instrument, one must have great technique if one wants more than a little noise.

That and timing... a pacing... you know... cadence.

[Miner]

I started by instructing my girlr to ask permission to cum. I'd talk her towards orgasm while we played - describing what she was feeling, and how.

That got her used to me allowing her orgasm and associated the sound of my voice with her orgasm. In other words I conditioned her to associate orgasm with the sound of my voice. The conditioning didn't take all that long (and she'd never been taken that route before - to have to ask permission to cum).

Initially I allowed her to cum immediately on request - over a few weeks, I altered that to sometimes withhold permission for a time - and force her to hold on until allowed.

Now I don't think she can cum without permission at all.

Once I'd established that 'cum on demand' conditioning I modified how I told her to cum.... When I say 'cum' softly, she has a gentle orgasm (useful for calming her after an intense session). If I snap the word out, she cums hard....and if I hum the word - holding the m - she cums extremely intensely and will orgasm for as long as I hold the word.

Volume is immaterial - I can whisper, speak normally or shout (she cums regardless, though the intensity depends on volume as well as method of speaking). She now requires no stimulation other than my voice - even in a very vanilla situation - with a look and a word I can make her cum...the word doesn't even need to be 'cum' - 'yes' works as well.

And if she is stimulated, a mere nod of my head with a look can take her to orgasm.

In many ways, trained 'orgasm on demand' is extremely easy to instill in a girl, once you work out what works for you (for the Dom). It takes consistency of approach initially - but once the conditioning is imprinted it doesn't go away

[denuseri]

Actually the conditioning can fade if you wait to long between; at least for me.

Of course the type of conditioning that is used on me isnt exactly like the conditioning described by many that have posted before me above.

I and others have discussed this in a few other threads here.

These are taken from my posts in some of the threads mentioned bellow:

CR is a way of life for me now, i am never to cum unles ordered too, or forced to by a dominate, of course one should keep in mind that if you are in the process of conditioning a sub for "cum training" or orgasm control or maintaining such conditioning, (like he commands yu to cum on command and or stop mid orgasm on command) that waiting too long between trainning sessions and or orgasms is actually detrimental to achieveing that kind of control

the time between "trainning sessions" required to successfully be able to cum on command with no outside stimulas of course varies between individuals

routine maintanence trainning is an on going proccess as well

for me it took a full month with two to three sessions per week of 2-6 hr increments to achieve my first real cold start orgasm with nothing more than a single command from my owner and absolutely no stimulation prior,

going a week on cr after that actually set us back as i was not able to re-achieve the desired result from a cold start, so it was back to the training sessions for a couple weeks again,

now i am pretty much on spot with no stinulation (starting maintaining sometimes up to 20-40 minutes or so, and stoping all on command with no touching) though i dont reccomend trying for such long ones as 40mins they can be devestating ive only had one that went that long

i am not saying there is only one way to do this, i am sure everyone thats done it has thier own way but i get a lot of questions on how to do it so here goes

well in my case, thier was no stimulation to warm up, no edging, and not much cr, infact too much cr and it was detrimental to maintaining the desired effect,

basically it was some pretty long sessions initially some up to 8 hrs but mostly average was 4,, body position was very important in the initial training too, as was the use of restraint to apply muscle tension in a pretty specific way, a way that put a lot of focus on the thighs, buttocks, perinium, etc. (it was very simular to sitting in nadu) so its no wonder i stay so ready as i spend a lot of time kneeling in that position, all thats needed at first is eaither a certian type of hard wood chair , a good stool, double wide saw horses, and or the more traditional bambo poles (short ones 2-4 of them,about two to four feet long) oh and some rope, and some flexibility training,i recomend yoga, you could do it all without the props but it will take much longer to achieve the effect, most all of the sessions after the first one are reinforcment sessions though many variations of the first session

we didnt do any preliminary edge play eaither the hojojutsu technique didnt call for it
didnt matter anyway after the first 5 minutes in position your allready shaking some from the tension,,the position required me to clench and bear down to attempt to aleviate the constantly building pressure in my legs

you rapidly learn to focus on your "holes" too as sometimes dildos or plugs are used to hieghten the effect, you also have a dominant right there telling you to clench and relax when he sees fit etc etc, you become super dependent on him very very quickely and are acutely aware of it, if he leaves yu sitting there in full position and his last order was to clench it can be a long ride, especially while blindfolded

eventually inbetween all the muscle tension pain and clenching and sweating you start to feel a different kind of pressure building inside,, like an approaching wave, centered right on the "spot" where a dick would drive deep (you ladies know where i am talking about) this builds too and as you go through repeated muscle spasms as yuor legs repeatably strain and give out and he has you clenching and holding more and more
you become so so much in his power so much so that when he finally says CUM that first time you think you have went insane ,because all of the sudden, WHAM, your cumming all over the place and you dont now how or why, "the earth gate" is very likely to open wide at that point so have some towels handy,

the amazing thing is you wont recal actually doing anything to cum for him, it will happen spontaniously, well that and it may very well be the biggest orgasm youve ever had up to that point

and that is only the begining of a first session weg
there are a variety of ways to train for this,,, some are easier than others, the method my owner used on me used kinbaku/ hojojutsu techniques that literally forced my body to respond rather quickley due to the type of muscle tension placed on the body, its also helped that i trainned on my own with tantric meditation techniques, yoga, and positive reinforcment focusing "mantras" for a ffew weeks prior and during the proccess, i still use them to this day

he can pretty much make me cum and stop with an order anywhere at anytime now,, all with never having to get me worked up before hand, he has even had me cum by command in an email before, and the funny thing is i cant "NOT" cum when he orders me , even if i try my best not too, when he says "cum" i cum,, its like my virginia really has a mind of its own that follows his wishes ( the first time that happened i thought my pussy was broke or i was going insane)

i have also been able to do this for an online dom i met here who is intimantly familuar with cum training techniques and actually got me and my owner interested in trying them out again, i had taken a haiatus from it for a while due to medical reasons, so its not just for "real life" play winks.....

....when i am covvered in sweat, my thighs burning from clenching and holding position, the ropes digging into my flesh, my insides primmed to explode with anticiapation, my eyes glazed over in sub space, when i hear his voice whisper in my ear, or even BOOM from accross the room, saying "CUM!!!!" ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,it is one muther-- fraker of a wild ass ride WEG

The other threads I mentioned:

http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/sh...ight=hojojutsu

http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/sh...ight=hojojutsu

http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/forums/sh...ight=hojojutsu

[MstrShimoda]

well my pet is also trained too cum on command. the word is cum now. i have made her cum in my wonderful places i choose. she also thought that was impossible but now she beleive's now lol. now soon i will be doing the same thing soon with her peeing on command that will diffently be fum lol.

Keep us posted on how the pee training goes..I have an interest in that..~S~..

[lilnerd]

I've never even had one, ever, no matter what. So in my mind, I just don't see the cum on command as possible.

[phantasy_seeker]

What I'd like to know, is if any male subs have ever achieved this? Ejaculating on command?

The reason being, is that a female orgasm really is an elusive thing. I'm not insinuating that all the females who claim to have done this are faking. What I mean is.. I honestly think the line between orgasm/strong sexual arousal for females isn't all that clear, as compared to men. Even now, after years of masturbation and sex, whenever I try something new (new technique, new vibrator), there are occasions when I 'think' I've orgasmed, but am not really sure, because it's a different feeling altogether. Sometimes the hypersensitivity following it clues me in that I really did orgasm - but then again, I do get hypersensitive after prolonged stimulation anyway.

So, what I think is that the female sub might not have 'biologically orgasmed' - as in, the chemical and biological events following a 'proper orgasm' might not have happened, because scientifically speaking, those can truly only occur with contact to the sexual organ.

However, due to conditioning and strong sexual arousal, the sub might associate that feeling in her head with that of a biological orgasm. So, for all intents and purposes, it is an orgasm to her.

If I ever see a man ejaculating on command, though, I will eat my words through and through.

[skye67]

So, what I think is that the female sub might not have 'biologically orgasmed' - as in, the chemical and biological events following a 'proper orgasm' might not have happened, because scientifically speaking, those can truly only occur with contact to the sexual organ.

However, due to conditioning and strong sexual arousal, the sub might associate that feeling in her head with that of a biological orgasm. So, for all intents and purposes, it is an orgasm to her.

If I ever see a man ejaculating on command, though, I will eat my words through and through.

I disagree, I have been trained and I do cum on demand. That orgasm does come with the spasms and the same feeling as a “normal” orgasm, so it is infact a "biological orgasm.
After all the brain is the most powerful sexual organ, just goes to show you what proper training can do for you

[phantasy_seeker]

Perhaps - I did say that to the sub, it would 'feel and seem' like a true orgasm. But that does not answer the question of why only female subs seem to be able to do it?

Then again, as long as it is an orgasm to the party involved, that should be all that matters really.

[skye67]

very true!
lol

[denuseri]

What I'd like to know, is if any male subs have ever achieved this? Ejaculating on command?

I dont believe its medically possible for a male to do it from a cold start without any prior arousal of some kind taking place, and an example of what I mean when I say from a cold start, is: "ring ring...hello yes master...(trigger given verbally) ....OOOOOOO for awhile (command trigger to stop orgasm given)...some time goes by, ...yes master thank you master". The male organ must have much more time than the females related systems to prime, without adequate time to become engorged with blood a man just isnt going to be able to do it.

The reason being, is that a female orgasm really is an elusive thing.

Not nearly as ellusive as many would have us believe. There is a lot of pussy footing around this issue between women who can have orgasms, including clitoral, vaginal, g-spot induced, with or without female ejaculate etc etc as being possible or not and those who can't. No one wants to think they are broke, missing somthing, or wierd cuase they can or cannot do somthing all the others can or cannot do. There are a number of phycological as well as phisological factors envolved in female orgasms in all of their varieties. One hormone thats out of balance and wala, nothing.

I'm not insinuating that all the females who claim to have done this are faking. What I mean is.. I honestly think the line between orgasm/strong sexual arousal for females isn't all that clear, as compared to men. Even now, after years of masturbation and sex, whenever I try something new (new technique, new vibrator), there are occasions when I 'think' I've orgasmed, but am not really sure, because it's a different feeling altogether. Sometimes the hypersensitivity following it clues me in that I really did orgasm - but then again, I do get hypersensitive after prolonged stimulation anyway.

One's preception of things in this regard is rather subjective for some of us I am sure, Ive experienced at times what I would call psuedo orgasms like what you are describing and real omg I cant believe I just gushed that much fluid out of my little body and wondering if I allmost broke a hip actual real biological orgasms.

So, what I think is that the female sub might not have 'biologically orgasmed' - as in, the chemical and biological events following a 'proper orgasm' might not have happened, because scientifically speaking, those can truly only occur with contact to the sexual organ.

I can't speak for others, but in my own case, they were as real as real gets, If I had to compare pseudo orgasms to real ones from conditioned response/trigger from a cold start I would have to say its 8 out of ten being real biological orgasms. Ive even experienced ejaculation from them sometimes.

However, due to conditioning and strong sexual arousal, the sub might associate that feeling in her head with that of a biological orgasm. So, for all intents and purposes, it is an orgasm to her.

If I ever see a man ejaculating on command, though, I will eat my words through and through.

You might see a man who has been fully aroused and teased to the point of cumming, cum on command sometime, but from a cold start...I also doubt it.

[Ozme52]

You might see a man who has been fully aroused and teased to the point of cumming, cum on command sometime, but from a cold start...I also doubt it.

And yet... many teenagers do it all the time.

So do a lot of men... but we give them a negative label and call them premature ejaculators.

denu... your experiences are with men who have been told to please their partners and with dominant men who exert control... not lose control. Hence your doubt.

But I imagine you could break down the barriers and talk the sperm right out of a man... and given the nature of male orgasms... it would be far easier to do than it is would be to train a woman.