Exactly. Good point and perspective denu.

I was not present, I have no perspective on the dynamic of the evening, let alone of the relationship... but consider this... if you had set aside your apparent immediate needs and focused on his instead, his needs, his wishes, his desires...
  • Might your needs, caused by those "emotional things (that) had happened during the day" have also been met if you had only focused your entire being on him?
  • Might you have felt very good about yourself seeing his pleasure, seeing to his needs, vanilla, kinky, or even non-sexual met and exceeded?
  • Might being told you were a good (and attentive) girl been just as satisfying as being bound... and
  • Might he have chosen to tie you up for his own pleasure if only he had the choice rather than the "obligation" created by your having asked?


It's hard to be dominant if you are directed to be so.

That which you need from him the most... evaporates the moment you demand it.