Here are a few tips for you:

A real dominant does not have to proclaim that fact. He is quietly confident in a way that brooks no objection, because he has already taken care of your needs.

Anyone con be rough or severe or even violent but the right domminant can also be tender and careful. Remember, he is the one who is going to take care of you after that fearsome flogging you have been dreaming about.

He also knows when to lay off and let you be. As much as some of us fantasize about a 24/7 lifestyle, there are times when we can not or should not engage in bdsm. He can tell when those times are and is responsible about it.

Most important, remember that the right dom is going to make you happy in the long term. If anyone sounds or looks or feels like a short term prospect, re-evaluate what you really want.

Good luck!