differnt types of sumissives

[DomBob]

Interesting topic.

Well the "Smart-Ass Masochist" are one type of sub. These tend to be bratty and challenging enjoying the struggle and fight both in the play room and out.

There are true-submissive's like the stereotype submissive oriental daughter or the women in the Eugenspeil Society - eyes downcast, and willing to be treated like property. They dont want to think for themselves or have any responsibility. This might be fun for a play-weekend or so, but it takes a lot of energy from the Dom. It's almost a rescue-relationship.

The happiest lifestyle couples I have met are what I would call "part time". They tend to be somewhat hippie style of couple very relaxed with each partner taking care of areas of the house and work and family roles. But when a signal is given either a word or putting on a collar, they switch to different roles for playtime/weekend fun. When I was younger this confused me how this could work, but now knowing I wear Husband, Father, Brother, Employee persona's - this is just another hat to wear.

Then there are switches or subs who try to "top from the bottom" by manipulation.

It might be fun to come up with some questions for newbie subs. Describe several interactions with a Dom and ask them to rate seeing themselves in the scene. This could range from submissive Domestic role, the sex-slave role waiting naked by the door for daily inspections/attention, the schoolgirl role with a punishment book where infractions are recorded all week to be delt with Friday night, The "drama queen" where you act like a normal couple except for every few nights she mis-behaves to provoke the dreaded "wait till I get you home missy!" reaction.

(A lot of this can touch on WHY the sub wants to be submissive. Which may be questions we dont want to ask.)

[openyoureyes]

It might be fun to come up with some questions for newbie subs. Describe several interactions with a Dom and ask them to rate seeing themselves in the scene. This could range from submissive Domestic role, the sex-slave role waiting naked by the door for daily inspections/attention, the schoolgirl role with a punishment book where infractions are recorded all week to be delt with Friday night, The "drama queen" where you act like a normal couple except for every few nights she mis-behaves to provoke the dreaded "wait till I get you home missy!" reaction.

(A lot of this can touch on WHY the sub wants to be submissive. Which may be questions we dont want to ask.)

I think it would be fun/interesting to see some type of survey like that done. I think that just as there are subs who are fiestier and like to push their boundaries, there are going to be Doms that enjoy reminding their subs where the boundaries are and reinforcing their dominance. I think for some this is just part of the appeal. For other Doms, they will desire more compliance and there will be other subs that will crave more guidance/approval. I think there is a myriad of categories in between (and probably outside of this, too).

It would be interesting to see a survey done that would help both Doms and subs find where they land on that spectrum as I think finding a good match is key. For instance, if a more fiesty sub ended up with a Dom who wanted total compliance, or if a more compliant sub ended up with a Dom who wanted a little of a fight, it could cause problems in the relationship.

I also think it makes a difference whether you are a certain way all of the time. For me, in day to day life, my boyfriend wants me to be opinionated and have my own hobbies/interests. But when I'm specifically with him the dynamic changes. We're still very new in our relationship, and figuring out our particular dynamic, but knowing that he cares what I think and how I feel about things makes it a lot easier to trust him when he says things or does things that would infuriate me if it were anyone other than him.