Hi there,

It seems from your description that the fundamental issue is a time thing. There's been a lot of good suggestions about additional things you can do to make things more 'hot' for her....which I think you have both appreciated...but the time thing is a killer especially with work and kids.

I'm not quite in the same situation with regards kids...our three are still under 10 years old (not sure of the changes to expect with teenagers) but I can tell you, and you probably remember, the kids demands on your time are crushingly persistent.

However, we're in the same situation as you with regards a 'time lag' between us. Recently we decided to change our routines which involved compromises on both sides -my side of the bargain meant organising my own working life better so that I could get home earlier and help share and alleviate some of the stress that that 'end-of-the-working-day dealing with kids' syndrome was causing my wife.

In fact it worked out great: the kids were less ratty when there was one more adult around -either of us could be more available; the kids got to see more of their Dad, we ate earlier as a family and the kids ended up getting used to going to bed earlier...with the result that we created more time for ourselves and our indulgences...the consequent effect on the quality and quantity of our sex-life was truly positive.

I dont know if there's any feasibility in that for you two...but if so...give it a try, and you may find more time to exploit all the sexy ideas that have been proposed in the previous posts.

Create the Time....and it creates the Space. Good luck!