Walking Away

[StormKat]

SK, I would say you have already answered the question for yourself.

I removed the (very well-written) explanations above the questions in each paragraph, leaving just the questions. If you read them together, they are less of questions and more of "I know the answer already, but I just need some affirmation I am not reading this situation wrong."

SK, you are NOT reading the situation wrong.

Thanks delia, I really appreciate your insight.

But... apparently that just isn't enough in this case. The Dominant is screaming out in silence, "I AM NOT INTERESTED" in the way he is treating you: by ignoring you for periods of time, by shunning you in favor of the other submissive in the relationship, by not visiting (when it's suggested in your post that it's entirely possible but just doesn't happen), by shunting off your needs (mental, emotional). Whether it's conscious or not, it's what's happening. I would generally say to a submissive, "give it time, try to work it out." In this case, you have. You have already given it time. You have already tried absolutely everything you can. The result? He hasn't budged and he hasn't changed. He is telling you, subconsciously or consciously, "I have made my choice."

What you said here rings sadly true as well...

The hardest step is admitting that it is time to move on.

It would be easier if this situation involved some egregious abuse - a limit crossed, a safeword ignored - that would make leaving immediately clear. When it's a complex 2-year relationship that just seems to have gotten lost, well, nothing is quite so obvious. But sometimes moving on is the only thing to do.