hello everyone, i am submissive 24 year old woman.
I have never been in DBSM relationship before, only recently i have become Masters WestCoastDom property online. I have always had verry submissive personality,but unable to act on it. My father had been very abusive from as long as i remember, i escaped that about 6 years ago by moving to UK with my boyfriend. I have split up with him only two months ago. We had been equals, but only in name, unfortunatelly all responsibility and everything else related always was on wy shoulders. i could cope with vanilla equal relationship, but about half a year ago he to started become more and more submissive. Iwas sick of it. I dont remember last time i cum because of him. He lost inicjative in bed, i would have to appoach him - or just plaint tel him what to do. I AM submissive for christ sake! i tried to talk about this wit him, but he woul never listen. I was the one in controll of everything inside and outside of bedroom - when i longed for such a long time for exact oposite!!!
last straw was 2 months ago - he cheated on me, told me i do not satisfy hi any longer, than left me after claening my saving account wit 2 and 3 years old daughters of ours. He just left...
That is enough - i decided. I want someone to love me, to take care of me, to take away controll and responsibility - i do not want to make any more choices - i am sick and tired of it.
I just want someone - Master or Dom - to kneel by their feet, i need to please, for them to be proud of me - to know that i can be usefull, to be needed, to be hel and loved, to know they take pleasure from my body and my behaviour.
i do not know how to explain it. I do not know my limits, i have very high pain treshold. i am very openminded and willing to try everything at least once.
I need someone to trust, to give up and give in, someone who care enough to award me when i did something right and to punish me when i screw up.
Am i really selfish? Is it to much to ask?
I dont know...