Finding My Inner Sub

[thir]

Really, because I haven't found someone I trusted enough to admit my kinks to them (I have a lot of insecurities on the subject within the context of relationships - bad experiences and what not). But now I've begun to notice that my submissive tendencies have leaked into my relationships in other areas where they may be less welcome, causing me to compromise myself without realizing it. And now, as I'm slowly coming to terms with my rather kinky sexuality, I'm not sure how I should proceed in relationships. I feel reluctant to bare-all with my wants, but I don't want my dissatisfaction and desires to taint other areas of my relationships... what should I do? How is this handled?

The tendency seems to be that sub feelings (any more than dom feelings) do not go away..and you say your are coming to terms with them and want to do something about it.

A lot of people feel that this is so private and so important, they are scared talking about it. But if you want to do something about having your needs met, there is no avoiding it.

Would it help, maybe, to start talking about them here, in a safe forum with people who understand because they feel the same way? Get more used to talking about it - sort of a bit at a time? Get the words you can use? Maybe ask people how they broached the topic with their partners, or if they found one in the bdsm target group from the start?