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  1. #1
    {Leo9}
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    Quote Originally Posted by MMI View Post
    I agree with the first part, den. Feminism that adopts a positive approach to societal reform is to be encouraged, but militant feminism of the kind Greer espouses is no better than the male sexism it despises, and it should be shunned. You don't get equality by oppressing your oppressor, you simply turn the table.
    Exactly

    [quote]
    the number of instances where the abuser is the woman is surprising (to me anyway). It also seems that, among the younger generation - those in their 20's - the level of abuse is more or less equal.
    [/qutoe]

    I guess sex is no better than the other..

    because the female abuser claims that she is the victim of her partner.

    Someone suggested this could not be, because the man could show the marks made on his body when he was attacked. While that is true, I am sure that such women are capable of marking themselves if they want to,
    This seems quite farfetched to me - what do you base this idea on? I mean, mark themselves how? And that still does not mean that the man isn't marked.

    but, more likely, the abuse takes a different form, a form women are far more able to inflict than physical violence, namely, mental abuse.
    Why do you feel that women are more able to inflict mental abuse than men?

    Mental torture can be more insidious, more degrading and more permanent in its effects than physical violence. Its marks are invisible, however.
    Perhaps..I think they kind of go together.

  2. #2
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    @ thir

    I'm surprised you think my suggestion is far-fetched. Let us say you have been abusing your man, by beating him and burning him. He gets bruises and burns, true. But now you realise he's called the police, and you face a spell in gaol. You can easily cause bruises on yourself, and you can probably say he attacked you with a kettle of boiling water, but you fought back (hence the bruises on both of you) and the idiot spilt the kettle on himself. At least you have a chance of getting away with it. Depends on how meek and mild you can convince the policeman you are.

    Far-fetched, as an example, maybe. But it could happen, so in reality, maybe not.

    Also, I believe women will resort to mental abuse rather than physical because, (a) men are usually stronger, (b) women understand emotions better than men, and can manipulate feelings more easily, (c) women are more proficient verbally than men, and can always find a way to belittle them.

    Finally, a doctor once told me that a mental injury takes up to 20 times longer to heal than a physical one. Assuming it does heal, I suppose.

  3. #3
    {Leo9}
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    Quote Originally Posted by MMI View Post
    @ thir

    I'm surprised you think my suggestion is far-fetched. Let us say you have been abusing your man, by beating him and burning him. He gets bruises and burns, true. But now you realise he's called the police, and you face a spell in gaol. You can easily cause bruises on yourself, and you can probably say he attacked you with a kettle of boiling water, but you fought back (hence the bruises on both of you) and the idiot spilt the kettle on himself. At least you have a chance of getting away with it. Depends on how meek and mild you can convince the policeman you are.


    Far-fetched, as an example, maybe. But it could happen, so in reality, maybe not.
    Very unlikely. I do not think it would be so easy to mark yourself, not convincingly. Also people who are this violent are probaly not so very well sppoken, or they would not have to resort to violence.

    Also, I believe women will resort to mental abuse rather than physical because, (a) men are usually stronger, (b) women understand emotions better than men, and can manipulate feelings more easily, (c) women are more proficient verbally than men, and can always find a way to belittle them.
    The question is whether b and c are myths or real, but in any way not a very nice picture of women in general. I admit I have more faith in people, men and women both.

    Finally, a doctor once told me that a mental injury takes up to 20 times longer to heal than a physical one. Assuming it does heal, I suppose.
    Meaning? As Denuseri brought up, physical unjuries also cause mental ones.

  4. #4
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    Cool

    I'm not sure how convincing you have to be, bearing in mind that most people will want to believe that it was the man, not the woman, at fault - including the police and medical services.



    I do believe women are more sensitive to emotional feelings than men are, and that they are better able to express themselves. Perhaps someone knows the facts for certain, or can do the research to answer the point precisely. But if a female abuser is intent on putting the blame on to her victim, she doesn't need to injure herself, she can claim mental torture ...





    I also believe that, although physical injuries can also cause mental ones, they far more frequently don't. I have suffered many physical injuries, but I don't think any of them was accompanied by mental ones. Again, someone might like to dig up the facts and figures on this.

  5. #5
    Just a little OFF
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    Quote Originally Posted by MMI View Post
    I do believe women are more sensitive to emotional feelings than men are, and that they are better able to express themselves. Perhaps someone knows the facts for certain, or can do the research to answer the point precisely.
    It's my understanding that, in general, women tend to be better able to express emotions than men. But I don't have any data to back that up.

    I also believe that, although physical injuries can also cause mental ones, they far more frequently don't. I have suffered many physical injuries, but I don't think any of them was accompanied by mental ones. Again, someone might like to dig up the facts and figures on this.
    I don't think that it is JUST the physical injuries but the circumstances as well. Falling down and breaking your arm would not have nearly as much emotional impact as having that arm deliberately broken by a loved one. I can certainly understand how those emotional injuries could be very deep and long-lasting.
    "A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything." - Friedrich Nietzsche

  6. #6
    {Leo9}
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thorne View Post
    It's my understanding that, in general, women tend to be better able to express emotions than men. But I don't have any data to back that up.
    I really do not think one can be so general - men do this, women do that. I think we are far more individual than that.
    Of course it is a fact that women are allowed feelings much more than men are, but that, IMO, is something only the men can demand for themselves. IMO it would be a good idea to do so, doubless it would be a both better and longer life for men.

    Also, if you are sat down as many girls are, you learn to express yourself with your words and use your head. More freedom here, for everybody, mind, would be a good thing.

    I don't think that it is JUST the physical injuries but the circumstances as well. Falling down and breaking your arm would not have nearly as much emotional impact as having that arm deliberately broken by a loved one. I can certainly understand how those emotional injuries could be very deep and long-lasting.
    yes, indeed, that goes without saying, whether it is a man or a woman doing the ugly deed.

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