Torian and I have been together for almost four years now. I know for a FACT that I have tested him several times over those four years. However, those tests weren't intentional. It was simply a natural reaction to being told, "If you do this, this will happen." Ok. So I do it. Maybe not on purpose, but I do it. It's not a matter of doubting Torian's dominance or control in the relationship. And it has nothing to do with not trusting him. It's me, in my submission, looking for reassurance that this action WILL lead to this consequence. And unfortunately, words are RARELY enough for reassurance. I need physical action, as I'm sure many submissives do. And, on the other side of the same coin, I fully expect my own submissives, when I have them, to push and test me to see if I will actually follow through on what I say will happen if they do this or that.

I can see both sides of this argument, and truthfully, I think it varies from one relationship to the next as to whether or not verbal communication will suffice to remind or reassure a submissive of their place in a relationship.