Quote Originally Posted by this.is.me View Post
So I had been told by a dom who I was somewhat serious with (and am no longer talking to) that the reason he liked this other girl better is because she so bratty and its just so much fun to play with her. I don't get any kind of thrill from trying to 'run away' during a scene or back talking, I am pretty much the opposite of bratty (whatever the word for that is). While I am still a bit upset to see the two of them together I have come to terms that if thats what he was looking for we had no business being together because I will never be that girl he wants.

However today I was playing with someone new and they mentioned how they are used to playing with girls that are a lot more mouthy than me. In fact usually most the scene is based around getting the girl to shut up, because of that he was having a lot of trouble telling when to end things. We had fun and all, plan to play again, but I have a feeling he was disappointed I didn't really 'put up a fight'.

I don't understand the appeal, and it seems like a majority of the people I know (doms and subs) play that way. I personally don't think you can do BDSM 'wrong', aside from people just being stupidly dangerous. It seems lately like I am doing it wrong though. Kind of like I am failing at doing what the person topping me wants; by doing what they ask me to do. It is getting really frustrating. Can someone please explain this to me? It does not feel good to be told that your just not that much fun to play.
You've got some good answers here, but I just wanted to put in a bit of my own experience: I was in a club where 'bratting' was the accepted norm, that is, a lot of the founders had it, so it just sort of became 'what you do'. In fact, it is amazing how fast that thing can happen..I do not like the bratty game either, there is nothing wrong with it, but you have to be on the same page, just as with everything else, and I found it annoying and getting in the way of some more intense scenes.

It is possible that you have fallen in with some people who have influenced each other into using the same kind of game, which can give you the impression that that is how things are done, and you do not fit in. But as people here are saying: it takes all kinds, and yours is certainly appreciated by a lot of people - you are much easier in many ways to deal with ;-)