Our relationship is based on love first, and D/s (M/s) second. I don't see how it causes a problem. If anything it makes the connection deeper and more meaningful. It is not up to him to be harsh enough to make me be under control. He just has to be dominant and I am wanting to submit already. For us, love does not kill the control or the sex, it enhances it.

I don't know how it would be otherwise, since I don't have the experience, but maybe someone else can comment.