Blog Comments

I would say have a serous talk with him find out what he wants, as well as what you really want.

Sexual issues are the fastest way to kill a marriage.

Read a safety ariticle about finding Doms online, it said one Dom to about 20 subs, so part of the process might be making your own Dom. Keep in mind, we are taught from an early age not to cause females pain, and they may have what you want confused with abuse. Also check if they have any issues in this area, a mother or sister who has had the crap beaten out of them, on a regular basis, will effect how they see violence towards you.

Mmmm, of course H Dean and fallenangel are right of course. But i sympathise with you so much. I am in a similar situation (althought i have to say your husband is much more receptive to the idea of bdsm than mine). I have the same trouble -'I cant do that, it will hurt you' - DOH thats kind of the idea!!!!!! This site must have helped you hasnt it Sindra? I know it has me...... its where I met someone who has lit up my life. Of course its not what I started off trying to do - I never dreamed that I would end up sneaking out to meet someone - I started 'playing' online with some guys I met on chat, but after talking for weeks on messenger with my Master I now realise that this is what I have been looking for all these years. I dont recommend this course of action..... there is pain (and not of the nipple clamp and flogger variety) as well as pleasure (in bucketloads)!!!! but also guilt....... I love my husband so much..... but when the chips are down, after years of always wanting to please him, I love myself more (and that is all thanks to my Master) (My self-esteem was rock-bottom when i met him - and is now sky-high)

I have rambled a bit here Sindra, but the upshot of what I have to say is NO NO NO there isnt anything wrong with you - its just that you have to find a way to please both of you. I wonder how long u have been married? As these feelings seem to grow over the years or at least did so for me - look me up if u ever need to talk and we can share experiences. xx

H Dean has a point. You say you want these things 'all the time' but have you ever thought that perhaps your husband would prefer vanilla all the time? The word here is compromise...

So much about what you want. Have you bothered to find out what he wants?