Distance Domination

Not all of us are in a position where we can be with our S/O's all the time, but we still crave that dominant connection, that little buzz of control or submission. Then too, there are some of us who might strike up a D/s relationship on line that we'd like to take to the next level beyond just exchanging e-mails and IM's.

In both these cases we run into the problem of distance domination, or how to run a distance D/s relationship. What kind of things can we do when we're separated to maintain that special feeling of closeness and control we get from a D/s relationship.

Some things are obvious. Having the sub keep a journal or log is common, as is having them wear a token of their dom's influence, be it a collar or something less spectacular. Cyber sex is ubiquitous too, of course.

But what about things that might be more dramatic and memorable? The days when the sub is ordered to go without underthings, or to masturbate at a certain time of day, no matter where they are and report back to the dom.

What tips and secrets do you have for mantaining a distance D/s relationship? What works for you?

Communication and scheduling are key practical matters for me. My slave has a schedule on Yahoo that she uses so I know where she is and what she is up to in the most specific way she can maintain. On it are her work hours and other social commitments as well as her training schedule. I can use this to add tasks or notes. We also use every form of chat imaginable: SMS, YahooIM, iChat for cam sessions and multiple email accounts and of course, this site.

I have her perform her 'remote' tasks and record audio or video of them as documents of her service. She then posts them on her Apple iDisk (but any FTP will work). I then download and review them at my leisure. She also reports daily service tasks by IM to me so I know when she's been serving me. All of this adds up to provide a presence in our daily lives. Isn't technology wonderful (except when your video link goes down in the middle of an intense cam session)!

My slave is very good at whip, cane and crop and thru her hand I administer corporal punishment and pleasure.

This slave is smiling at Master's post. Technology has allowed O/our relationship to be as close to a 24/7 TPE as can be managed despite the distance and the every day obligations.

(What also helps is that both Master and this slave are very computer savvy and technology driven creative people, resulting in ideas flowing for multiple ways to stay in contact with one another)

Just as a tip, a belt can be a useful whip for a self-administered floggings when she's away from home. A bobby pin can be a stand-in for a clit clamp. You find yourself doing a lot of improvisation.

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