i am...curious about some things..and wonder if anyone else is having similar issues. i am a rt live in submissive. we are married...we met on collarme.com...He was relatively new to the lifestyle..i wasn't. but that wasn't important to me. anyone who is driven can learn anything. and he was clearly dominant by nature. now, after four years of being together..and 3 years of marriage..things have turned rather...vanilla between us. who is to 'blame'? both..neither. whatever. life happens. trash needs to be taken out. dog needs to be walked. bills need to be paid. did we become..complacent perhaps? the collar that i wear 24/7 that is locked around my throat has become a piece of jewelry in many ways. the symbolism somehow..lost in the reality of daily life. we discussed this last night...i am frustrated..i want/need/crave more. but our D/s has crumbled so far, that i wonder if it is possible to get it back. make no mistakes...i am deleriously happy with this Man. i love him with all my heart and soul, and would never...leave him because of this. we are committed to 'us' and our marriage. but...i feel..empty in 'that' place. its not about the 'play'..its about daily D/s. i dont' need to be micromanaged. i am quite housebroken...cooking, cleaning, laundry...all that is done without a second thought. but what now? where do we begin again? and can i.....feel like that towards him again...? i dont' at this point. i love him. he is my best friend. he is my confidant. he is perfect in every other way. i'm just not sure we can get 'that' back again...