Quote Originally Posted by jamwish View Post
Could to much talk blow it?
No, off-course not. But you could find out that what it is you are seeking isn't your partner, and vice versa. Either way you've got little to lose. You will develop as a person with or without her. The only differance is the time it takes.

I think you need to put some effort in figuring out what exactly it is that fear might happen and why you are letting yourself be ruled by your fears?

Quote Originally Posted by jamwish View Post
My main fear here is myself... I've been wanting this for so long that sometimes i spread it to our "outside" life. And that puts her off, wich in turn pisses me off, etc, etc... What do you do to maintain proper separation of states in your mind?
It sounds like you think being a Master is an act. People are different and I can only talk for myself. There's no separation of states in my mind. I'm always dominant and extremly considerate at the same time, (I have to be or I'd be one lonely man). When I give my slave orders she always obeys. I know this and so does she. So I don't have to play any games. I can just focus on being me, and she can focus on making me happy. This is D/s for me and my slave. But I've been into this for 14 years. I too have ha some years where I've been very confused. You have to figure out what D/s is for you and your wife.

Don't forget or doubt that she loves you....obviously. Or she wouldn't want to take this journey with you.