I can relate to your sentiment, if not your specific situations...
I know that frustration and loneliness of being alone- I hate it as well...

Try the batting range when you're feeling stressed! lol
Or maybe shooting range... I know that feeling when you've just got to break something or you yourself will break!

Hard not to self-destruct sometimes (e.g. drink till you're blind)... hard to keep that self-control that you know you eed and is better for you long-term...

So good luck, warm prayers, and happy wishes I put out there in your direction...