Goodgirl,

I was very touched by your post. There was a time, when I was young, when I felt just like you (even though I knew nothing of BDSM at the time and merely wanted a regular boyfriend). At the time I felt the best way to break the curse that seemed to grip me was pretend it didn't exist and stop looking. I still plucked up the courage to go out and socialize, but by not actively looking for a partner I was able to feel less stressed. Ultimately, Mr Right did suddenly pop into my life when I was least expecting it. We had twenty or so years happily together but am back to being single again. These days I don't mind the solitude, but I still remember the days when I felt the same way as you do.

Don't give up!

Wishing you all the best,

anonymouse