I have a similar situation and decided the relationship was more important. We have played, a little, not recently ... she has decided "no more" but can't / wont say why.

She knows my interests and that I read and participate on line, a middle road that works for me. My kink happens in my head.

BSTG is right - you have to figure out what's important to you and as many options as you can. Then redEva is right - you have to communicate what you're thinking about: content, importance, and options. That's a big hurdle, might be a tough conversation. With luck, he'll be as interested in you as you obviously are in him and you'll work out an accommodation.

Best wishes.