Quote Originally Posted by Isabelle90 View Post
Many have said that a D/s relationship is one of honesty and respect. If someone is in a D/s relationship outside of a marriage, presumably vanilla, how can either of them (D/s couple) know that the other is being honest?

When is it "okay" to have a relationship outside of marriage? If someone realizes they are dominant or submissive but their spouse is neither, is it appropriate to start a new relationship with someone that is in the lifestyle?
...
to me, a betrayer will just as easily betray you. after all, if theyre doing so with their spouse, the person they have vowed to bind their life to.. then some bit on the side is up a creek at the first inconvenience. without Honour how could there be trust?

the only exception i can think of is if the person in question has talked to their spouse in all honesty and gotten their consent to find someone else, i assume for interests they cant live without but their spouse has no interest in. i have heard of that working out ok and crucially it's not a breach of Honour... if they really have discussed it.

id be darn sure it's true first though, if it were me. i think id want to talk to their spouse myself first to make sure it really is ok, what their take is on it, etc. and id have to be in some sort of special circumstances myself to risk it as it sounds like a less stable arrangement.

as for the online take on it i couldnt say as i dont do online and dont really see things that way. there is only one reality to me.