Slave Rule #3: i worship my Master.

Being a Christian, I have a problem with this particular rule. Thou shalt have no other gods before me is one of the ten commandments. How can I possibly put Daddy on the same level as a god? *shakes head* It's just wrong. That being said, it sometimes feels as if I do that very thing. Whenever I think about him and the fact that he's with me, of all people, it fills me with awe. I must admit that I've put him on a pedestal. Sometimes, it feels as if he's so far above me that I cannot possibly hope to be perfect enough for him. When he finds time for me, even whilst he's extremely busy with other things, the only feeling I can put words to is gratefulness. Instead of demanding time or to be included, I'll settle for whatever crumbs I can get. While this might seem as it should be, it can be a dangerous thing emotionally. Because of the way I feel about him and myself, I don't feel I can demand anything of him, including respect. If he decides to treat me in a manner that is rude or otherwise unsavory, I'll just take it. *nods* It's true. I'm so intimidated that I can't stand up for myself. I've tried, believe me. His words have such a powerful effect on me. In fact, he doesn't even have to speak. A growl will silence me immediately. It's not his belt I fear for I have seldom felt it. A verbal lashing will shred me quicker than any whip. If the truth be told, I probably fear him more than I fear God. I'm not afraid to talk to God, though I haven't had to deal with him face to face, yet. So far, the only way I've found to communicate with Daddy "safely" is via email. Hmm....it's kind of like praying, isn't it? I can speak my mind without actually hearing anything. If he chooses to respond, I'll know it eventually. *smiles*