Quote Originally Posted by lost innocense
As a survivor of rape I can tell you, after many years of secrecy, that it is common for many victims of rape to have guilt. Guilt because a for many there was a point of enjoyment and turn on by this act even though it wasn't consensual. I still get turned on by the stories of being taken in this way. This is part of the reason I have a deep seeded fascination with BDSM. I have in many ways taken control of my life in finding a safe way to face these demons. I like it rough, and sometimes the idea of an unknown assailant.

I just came across this thread and found it interesting, and your story very touching. Well done for seeming to have found a way of dealing with what must have been a very truamatic time in your live. I have often wondered if some of the interest in BDSM comes from being abused. I suppose people react in different ways to what life throws at them. I hope you continue to find a way to face those demons.
Aussiegirl1