A few years ago, I had my kitten strapped down on the bed and things had progressed to the point where she was doing her Exorcist-thing, that being to try to levitate off the bed. She'd managed to get all but the top of her head and her heels in the air. I was kneeling beside her, facing her feet with one arm around her waist and the other hand inside her to keep things going.

This time I had only attached her arms to straps, spread to the top corners of the bed-frame, so her feet were free and she was inching her way farther up the bed as things went on. There's typically a lot of thrashing and screaming and kicking going on at this point -- in fact, with her legs free she'll often try to wrap them around something of mine (she's not usually particular) and squeeze, so I was simultaneously concentrating on keeping things going, not getting hurt and keeping her in the center of the bed. I mention this only to make it clear that I had a lot on my mind.

Imagine my surprise when I turned to see her face and found that my kitten had no head.

She had pulled herself (and me) so far toward the top of the bed that her head had slid down between the mattress and headboard. Now I figure I need to get her head out of there before she either suffocates or dislocates a shoulder, so I let go of her waist and reach down between the headboard and mattress to grab her shoulder, keeping my other hand occupied inside her, because the problem isn't serious enough to warrant interrupting what she's got going.

I start to gently but firmly pull her back up onto the bed.

Now, what I didn't realize is that her head had gone pretty far down -- far enough that she'd passed the bottom edge of the headboard and her head was turned to the side so she had one side of her face against the mattress and one against the headboard. As I pulled her up, her ear on the headboard side, which had gone down past that edge fine, now caught coming back up.

So, yes, I gently but firmly tried to rip my kitten's ear off.

Needless to say, this brought about an abrupt and rather rude end to what she was experiencing ... although the screaming did continue ...