Slave profile?

[thir]

Albus [the hero's mentor] has what he considers a profile for the natural slave – inadequate or alcoholic parents, need to control, being used and neglected in relationships, a vocational calling to the forces or teaching or nursing – and she ticked all the boxes.
Later it transpires that the sub has trouble masturbating to orgasm, and the hero reflects "Score another for the Albus slave profile!"

I think it is worth mentioning that these points are all part of the same thing.
With alcoholic parents you tend to be either over controlling or out of control depending on how you managed the problem, your take your idea of what marriage is like from your parents, you often nurse yourself by nursing others, and, as said, difficulty with orgasms is fear of lack of control, in this context anyway.

So, as I see it, it is not a checklist as such, more a matter of whether some subs/slaves tend to choose that way of living as part of dealing with such a family back ground and the scars it will give you. Which is not to say that living like that is a picnic or a refuge, but that it is, for some people, a way to live with strength in another way than most people choose. Much the same as the source of some creative people's talent stems from troubles in the past.

As for the list... My first sub girlfriend: 2 and 4. Eisha, my ex-wife: 1, 2, 3 and 5. Note that 5 is explicitly about being unable to masturbate (usually through fear of losing control), not about anorgasmia: once I'd forced her through the fear barrier, she had no trouble coming thereafter. Wunja, my late wife: 1, 3 and 5. Taffi, my ex-slave: 1, 2, 3.

Me, 1 and 2. But I am not very submissive, more dominant than anything else. It is only MyLord Leo9 who can somehow reach into me and drag out submission, more or less against my will...

So, is your list of parners representative of subs/slaves, or does it simply say what kind of people you attract/are attracted to? You do tend to pick up strays ;-)

Regulars will know that I'll disagree hotly any time someone raises the old idea that all BDSMers have been abused (and that's why we're so sick and twisted.) That's both oversimplified and demonstrably false, but it's not to say there aren't some influences that at least some of us have in common. And though the characters in the story wouldn't say it, being much less broad-minded than their author, I'd guess that this may also apply to a lot of Dom(me)s.
Any views?

Sounds to me like you say that most BDSM people have had a strong negative influence in their lives, which they turn into something positive.
Is that right?

I still do not agree. I don't think it is that simple. For a given value of 'simple'.

[leo9]

I think it is worth mentioning that these points are all part of the same thing.
With alcoholic parents you tend to be either over controlling or out of control depending on how you managed the problem, your take your idea of what marriage is like from your parents, you often nurse yourself by nursing others, and, as said, difficulty with orgasms is fear of lack of control, in this context anyway.

I hadn't noticed, but you're right. That puts a different slant on it, indeed.

So, as I see it, it is not a checklist as such, more a matter of whether some subs/slaves tend to choose that way of living as part of dealing with such a family back ground and the scars it will give you. Which is not to say that living like that is a picnic or a refuge, but that it is, for some people, a way to live with strength in another way than most people choose. Much the same as the source of some creative people's talent stems from troubles in the past.

That's how I see it. The only one of mine who didn't have such a background was Taffi, and she'd had horrendous childhood injuries; I often wondered if she enjoyed pain because she'd had to learn to ride it or be broken by it.

Me, 1 and 2. But I am not very submissive, more dominant than anything else. It is only MyLord Leo9 who can somehow reach into me and drag out submission, more or less against my will...

And you look all the more beautiful for being so surprised by it

So, is your list of parners representative of subs/slaves, or does it simply say what kind of people you attract/are attracted to? You do tend to pick up strays ;-)

True, but I also pick up subs. So I stand by my view that I've identified, let's say, a significant group within the D/s population.

Sounds to me like you say that most BDSM people have had a strong negative influence in their lives, which they turn into something positive.
Is that right?

I still do not agree. I don't think it is that simple. For a given value of 'simple'.

I don't have enough information to say "most": let's say, a statistically significant number. But as you point out, my sample is biased by my other tastes, so it may not be as important a tendency as I thought.