I have to admit that I have had a fortunate life. With my work I have travelled to many countries and even lived in a few others than my native oz. I have lived in the UK for a year, Singapore for 10 and Thailand for 3.

Thailand is one that will stay in my mind forever, apart from a very memorable relationship there, the country and people are very special. Anyone that has been there even on a short holiday visit will remember it as the land of smiles. Walking down a busy street and you accidently bump into another, you will be responded to with a smile (as an apology). Lose your temper in an argument and again, instead of fierce words back, there will be a smile. A smile in Thailand covers all. Its a greeting, an apology, a thank you, or just a simple acknowledgement to a stranger passing by.

Unfortunately, there is a price for such tolerance. On the rare occasions I have seen tempers rise, they seem to get out of proportion for a minor incident. When we bottle up frustrations, its the straw that breaks the camels back, and all hell lets loose over 'nothing'.

D/s is sorta like Thailand. The subbie learns to smile and accept things even though they aren't quite what she wants. She suppresses these feelings within herself and forces a smile because a safeword wasn't warranted.

There of course will become an explosion one day over a very minor incident, because the final straw was placed on her back.

It is only through open communication that the final straw never arrives. The onus is on both parties to not only learn to speak of these 'minor issues', but also to learn to listen to each other and detect that the smile is hiding a stronger feeling.

Brosco