Anal sex and safety

[browny]

Im fairly new to the lifestyle, and since this forum is a wonderful place for information i thought i'd ask here.

I've always wondered about the preparations needed/required for engaging in anal intercourse (im not trying it or anyhting, but i'd like to know for the future). My biggest question, and really the reason for this thread, is what do you do about fecal matter? Is it enough to just go to the bathroom before you begin, or do you guys (the people who actively engage in anal sex) do an enema each and every time? And what other precautions can and should be taken as far as health concerns go?

[lily27]

We engage in anal sex, and I have never used an enema. (I am curious as to why you felt the need to specify that you weren't going to do it yourself actually.... did you think we were all going to judge you?)

In the spirit of education, "fecal matter" doesn't actually move down into your lower bowels until it is ready to be expelled. If you feel like you have to go, go. And if you don't feel it, then things should be fine.

If you have a healthy diet and are fairly "regular" in that area, things should be pretty clean. You body does a pretty good job of cleaning itself, when given the opportunity.

Of course things get messy from time to time, but that is honestly just the risk you have to run when engaging in this activity. I doubt that even enemas would protect against this in 100% of cases, but someone who actually does that will have to comment on it for sure. When it does happen to us, we just stop in the bathroom to get washed, and then get back to business. But probably 95% of the time, everything is fine.

As for safety, once something is in your ass (be it a penis, toy, fingers, ginger, etc.) it needs to be washed before it goes anywhere else. Some people get around this by using condoms (one for anal, one for other play), which works too.

Use lots of lube. Put on twice as much as you think you need, and then use more.

Go slowly. Very few people start their anal sex adventures with actual intercourse. Start with fingers or small toys, and work your way up.

Use your body as your guide. It will often hurt at first, but it should be a pleasant, stretchy hurt, not a "you are ripping apart my insides" kind of hurt. If it feels like this, STOP!!

And finally a word of warning regarding toys. Anything you put in your ass should have a wide base to avoid it slipping all the way in. The anal sphincter can actually pull objects in deeper, especially during orgasm. And unlike a vagina that is maybe 6 inches long and has a convenient stopper at the end, you are messing around with SIX FEET of bowels here. I have heard horror stories of slim vibes sliding all the way in and out of reach, and then overheating causing internal burns. Just not a conversation you want to be having with an emergency room doctor.

[browny]

Thanx lily, that was really helpful. As for why i specified, it wasnt cuz i though anyone would judge me (if that was the case i wouldn't have posted at all :P). I guess i just wanted to clarify that it wasn't something i was going to do tonite...for whatever reason. I do plan on trying it, definately. In fact i have tried a few times using my fingers or other slender objects (never actual toys..dont own any).

To be honest the few times i did try, i never found it pleasurable. not in the same way as masturbation anyway. I mean it didn't hurt either, but definately not the same pleasure some people seem to get. Maybe i was just doing it wrong . I wonder if toys would be better...perhaps the vibration is what's needed, i dunno.

[ohmytalia]

The reason anal sex feels different from masturbation is because it is different :P I'm not an expert, but I know purely physical orgasms from anal sex come from the massaging of the g-spot through the back wall of the vagina in females, and through the massaging of the prostate gland in men (the "male g-spot"). I doubt your fingers or small objects would have been able to apply pressure on these places the same way other methods can.

That, of course, leaves the psychological aspects of the act completely out of the picture (mmmm )

[browny]

feel free to share these other methods

I dont even know where the prostate is or how to reach it. I looked it up a long time a go, and if memory serves, the article i read said that if you curve your finger upwards you can feel the prostate gland....i dunno. im not even sure how i would know i've reached it, unless i suddenly have an orgasm lol.

[Sir_Russell]

In today's world there is a large risk in anal sex, aids has not gone away and there is still no cure for it.

I hate condoms but love anal so for a new submissive partner I will use one or go without. If she is mine in a long term exclusive relationship then the condom will not be used.

I wonder how many woman prefer anal bareback to with a condom. I would hope that feeling my actual cock in there is much more pleasant then knowing that it is latex that is touching them?

[lily27]

In today's world there is a large risk in anal sex, aids has not gone away and there is still no cure for it.

I hate condoms but love anal so for a new submissive partner I will use one or go without. If she is mine in a long term exclusive relationship then the condom will not be used.

I wonder how many woman prefer anal bareback to with a condom. I would hope that feeling my actual cock in there is much more pleasant then knowing that it is latex that is touching them?

I hate condoms no matter where they are used. They move and squish, and the feeling just gives me the heebie jeebies. Ugh.

I also find that they dry me out, and make me uncomfortable. Nonoxonyl-9, the spermicide most of them are coated in, is actually pretty toxic stuff. When it was found to kill off the HIV virus during the height of the AIDS epidemic it was fast-tracked through the approval process. They never actually studied what it would do to the sensitive skin on the inside of a vagina.

Subsequent studies showed it causes microscopic tears in the skin, which could actually help to facilitate the spread of disease. Google it.

That being said, I am in a long-term exclusive relationship, and have been tested for STDs. Otherwise, they are a necessary evil. I just always avoided the spermicide ones.

[WyldWyl]

Aye, nonoxonyl-9 is pretty nasty, but you can get them without it. Also, Lily, you might try finding some Avanti brand condoms, they're made of different stuff, and they might help.

Otherwise, to reiterate.
1. Lotsa lube. Seriously, you want enough, and then you want a little more. Don't be afraid to stop to re-lube during the act, either.
2. Start small.
3. Start slow...very slow indeed.
4. Enjoy it, it can feel great.
5. See 4.

[Davachido]

In today's world there is a large risk in anal sex, aids has not gone away and there is still no cure for it.

I hate condoms but love anal so for a new submissive partner I will use one or go without. If she is mine in a long term exclusive relationship then the condom will not be used.

I wonder how many woman prefer anal bareback to with a condom. I would hope that feeling my actual cock in there is much more pleasant then knowing that it is latex that is touching them?

Condoms no matter how much you hate them are probably the most effective tool we have against STDs. Lily is correct in saying that some of the spermicide is toxic so I'd second in using the ones without them.

@ browny: If you are going to use condoms for anal I'd suggest having adequate lube, the reason is that there is a lot of friction back there when compared to a vagina because of the shape of the anus so the condom will easily tear or come undone and be left in there.

I'd heavily advise using condom as again due to the shape of the anus it has a larger surface area and is easier to contract STDs. I'm not saying either you or your partner have them but be wary of safety ... or that just may be my virology course drilling this into my mind too much heh

[lily27]

Also, Lily, you might try finding some Avanti brand condoms, they're made of different stuff, and they might help.

I have tried those too (I once dated a guy with a latex allergy). They were ok... but are still condoms.

At this point I am in a commited relationship, and pregnant, so condoms are rather moot at this point!

[Guest020109]

I tried anal with my partner a while ago and we didn't try it again until last week. We just took it slow and easy. Here is a trick: if you are the receiver of anal, keep your mind off the pain. Watch TV or do something that will occupy your mind, just do that until the person is all the way in. Keeps your mind off the pain.

[jeanne]

I tried anal with my partner a while ago and we didn't try it again until last week. We just took it slow and easy. Here is a trick: if you are the receiver of anal, keep your mind off the pain. Watch TV or do something that will occupy your mind, just do that until the person is all the way in. Keeps your mind off the pain.

The pain is part of the thrill for me. Knowing that He knows it hurts and is doing it anyway...because He wants to, because He can...

Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

[caligirl{Rob}]

The pain is part of the thrill for me. Knowing that He knows it hurts and is doing it anyway...because He wants to, because He can...

Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

moans happily...yes yes yes

[Guest020109]

The pain is part of the thrill for me. Knowing that He knows it hurts and is doing it anyway...because He wants to, because He can...

Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

lol ohh gotcha, see i am new to this so i need to build my pain tolerance, besides TV doesn't fully get your mind off the pain...

[jeanne]

lol ohh gotcha, see i am new to this so i need to build my pain tolerance, besides TV doesn't fully get your mind off the pain...

Don't distract yourself, sweetie. Focus on it. Feel it. Feel Him, taking that most private part of your body. Feel yourself, wanting to please Him so much that you give it voluntarily, willingly, joyfully. Know in your heart and mind that your ass is His. Completely.

It helps if He whispers in your ear as He pushes in. What He says isn't the most important thing...as long as it's a verbal affirmation of His physical power over you. I'm partial to "You'll do anything for me, won't you?"

Oh yes. Use lots and lots and lots of lube.

[sublara]

Having gone to hospital and having to be put under a general anesthetic to remove a vibe (not going fortunately) I strongly attest to using toys with wide base. The fun of anal quickly disappeared under the bright lights of the hospital that night.