Wannabe subs - an undiscussed topic?

[Timberwolf]

I see where you're coming from. No real worries here. It's been an interesting debate, so far. Yo udo make some very good points.

"I’m only saying that.. I don’t believe enjoying whipping someone or having cyber slaves makes one a dom, and I don’t believe wanting to give yourself to every man and call him ‘Sir’ makes one a sub. I don’t think it is that simple. Theres more Complexities to domination and submission, its not about putting on a façade to give one an ego boost or get attention. It’s a way of life. "

I actually agree with this 100%. This journey has been the most complex thing I've ever undertaken.

[fantassy]

I've been enjoying the discussion in this thread because I wonder if I am merely a Wannabe sub. I don't know. I do know I am very happy with my current d/s online relationship, which has lasted for 7 months now. Although it is online/voice, it does spill over into real life within the parameters we established 7 months ago. I suppose I could lie and role play rather than actually do as instructed since He isn't present to monitor, but really, what would be the point of that? I don't see why the assumption is so often made that online subs lie and merely claim they are following directions. Do Doms assume that r/l sub lie about completing tasks when the Doms are not home to monitor? So in the sense that I really do what I claim to do, I am not a wanna be sub.

Nevertheless, I am not sub 24/7, and have no desire to be sub even a majority of the time. I am smart, confident, conscientious, successful and ambitious. In no area of life do I NEED someone to tell me what to do. In most areas of life I would be repulsed by someone's attempt to control me. However, in a few areas of life I DESIRE and ENJOY submitting to my Dom's control. Nothing feels as good. Does this make me a wannabe?

I feel that, and my Dom tells me that, when I submit, I submit fully. But I am often not in "sub mode." Does this make me a wannabe? My Dom claims that he gets the double benefit of enjoying His sub fantassy and the independent ME. Does this make me a wannabe? I honestly don't know.

fantassy