Submissive and Feminist

[lily27]

Oh man, I am not sure I should even get into this debate.

I have a major issue with the whole feminist "cause" thing. I think it has done more to hurt women than to help them.

Yes, I want to vote...and get paid the same... and I believe I am just as smart and capable as any man. But I am different.

The feminist movement was originally supposed to be about "choice". Women could "choose" to work. Or they could "choose" to stay home.

But in reality its not like that. The proof is that we are asking ourselves this questions. Am I hampering the "movement" by being submissive? Am I hampering the "movement" by staying home and raising my own children? Am I hampering the "movement" by cooking and cleaning?

Whenever we are having a tough day at work, one of my girlfriends and I joke about how we were "screwed by the feminists." We have to do just as much at home, but have 40 less hours a week to do it in because we have to work also. Instead of being chained to a stove, I am chained to a desk.

The "cause" also represses information that women need to know. Important studies about the dangers of birth control pills and abortions are scarcely reported lest it upset the feminests.

All that being said, I am a strong woman, well educated, and have a good, professional job. I am also a sub. The crazier my day at work, the more I need to submit when I get home. It is my release, my centre, and my driving force.

And if that upsets the feminists...well, screw 'em.

[moptop]

This is something I have been wondering about, and indeed for me it goes deeper, to trying to work out where my own personal submission stops. I have more or less reached the conclusion that I am personally - this is all just me, not proposing anyone else should be the same - middle of the road-ish, about everything. Basically, I believe in independence, mutual respect and tolerance. I am submissive and I do not see submission - a personal choice, and within my limits - as contradictory to feminism.

I believe that women are still quite often not respected and treated as equals within the workplace, or at home: where they are capable of providing an equal service, they should be treated equally. Where they are capable of better, they should be respected as such. Where they are less capable, they should be able to accept it.

Given that I appreciate the freedoms that I have as a woman in a 'liberated' society, I dislike the strongly feminist attitude, the ultra PC, the 'there's no difference' or, even, the 'wimmin are superior' attitudes.

That is where my middle of the road-ness comes in: I cannot approve of any set of beliefs taken to the extent where they lose tolerance, flexibility, acceptance of other's differences, and become demands for total compliance. I take the same attitude on politics; hard liner-veganism (come on : eating honey does NOT exploit the bees!); religion (I have my spirituality and beliefs; I honour other's beliefs; but I cannot comprehend the need to belong to a church or any body of faith that, again, wishes to dictate my behaviour: I don't try to dictate theirs); anything else that tends towards the fanatic/totalitarian.

The same goes for the lifestyle: total submission (slavedom in its most 'pure' form) does seem for me to be the antithesis of liberation and individuality, which I hold dear. But providing the individual (woman, in this instance, but men too) is happy and making a choice to be that way, then surely they are entirely living by feminist statutes: this choice has not been imposed upon them by society, they have arrived at it through their own free will.

Lot of words. I stress again, this is my opinion, my attitude to life: others differ, vive la différence.

[nowgirl]

All that being said, I am a strong woman, well educated, and have a good, professional job. I am also a sub. The crazier my day at work, the more I need to submit when I get home. It is my release, my centre, and my driving force.

After reading this thread, I go back to the original question & I agree with what lily said. Frankee stated this very well, too. Submission is part of who I am and keeps me grounded.

People who know me wouldn't say, "there's a feminist" just as much as they don't know me as a submissive... instead, they see me (I hope) as a strong, independent, smart woman who is also open, tolerant, well-balanced (most of the time!!) and nurturing.

This has been an interesting thread to read & I'm glad to be a part of a community that embraces all points of view.