I have the same thing with being restrained in any fashion i go nuts and get "violent mean" have been told it "survival mode on" after my own PTSD event.

shudders and not merely words...

Oh wow....
i hope you are willing to seek help.
I hope a counselor could work for you. I'd suggest that route before letting yourself be subjected again..
failed me.
JMTs.. but somethings can't be corrected P.H.O.