Thanks for elaborating.
This is where I get confused on the fine line issue- why is expressing one's needs if they're not being met, even using persistence, topping from the bottom? I get it in theory, particularly because you explained it well. What I don't get is why it's more than having a discussion that turns into an argument where someone tries to...well, for lack of a better word, win? I'm probably missing something here though, or maybe because I've never brought d/s outside of a bedroom my approach to a discussion would be different?
I think including ill-intent in your definition of TFTB is an important association because there is a negative connotation to TFTB, so a negative (ill-intent) should be included, also making it less encompassing.