Because, well....it was my school. It worked for me. I learned humility and to listen. I learned how to be greedy and violent and still have her begging for more. I killed off all my missconceptions of what it meant being submissive, and opened my mind to ignoring the "rules". Just because something worked for me doesn't have to mean that it will necesarily work for anybody else. First hand experience is required for any of the theory to make any sense. Again, this is me using myself as a reference.
Tom, what you have experienced and learned for yourself is exactly the type information I was hoping for when I posed this question in the first place. I can take all the pieces put out there and assimilate them into a working construct that will assist my husband and I in learning more and more...and more, hopefully. So again, thank you. What you offered up as advice and insight is quite a valuable resource for me.

As for guidance, or mentoring, that is probably a good idea
I agree, Rhabbi. My focus here isn't about ways to have better kinky sex. We already have a good bit of that. And what a grand secondary, but not my main objective. Nor my husband's. That's why Tom's advice to seek the input of an expert made perfect sense to me. Receiving guidance from someone who already has a working knowledge of the BDSM process would be a damn good resource as well.

It may be that I'm not as quick as the rest of you but I would need personal guidance as well
Your sense of humor just cracks me up, Tom. I'm still wiping away the laugh-y tears.