First of all I want to say that there are some fantastic posts here!

As someone who is still very new to this lifestyle and has not had to face a punishment, I too am learning a lot from everyone's comments. I do think it is different for different people and even different relationships.

I am only just starting to explore the world of CR and have begun to learn just how close to the "edge" I can get. Mind you, what I thought was close a month ago, I now know wasn't that close at all. In other words, my boundries are changing and I know they will keep changing as I get more confident in my own abilities.

Thus, as my boundries change, so do my Master's expectations of me. I guess one of my concerns with hearing of some subs being punished for not meeting their Dom/me's expectations, is why it happened. As has already been said, there are many and varied reasons for this, and so long as the reason is clear and discussed or communicated, both sub and dom/me can learn from them.

I am positive no subs set out to fail a task, but as fantassy said, if a sub is constantly having to be punished, then maybe there is something that needs changing.

I am in awe of so many of the subs I have gotten to know online, and still wonder if I will ever be able to do what they do! Mistakes will happen, people will have off days, life can intrude on our fun. Whatever happens, it is the communication that seems to be the key to keeping things on track.

I am not sure if I have added anything new to the discussion, but again it was great to read all of the posts. It is a complex issue and one which I as yet don't fully understand, but this is helping.