thanks all for the responses. mari, you must be very intune with people and their reactions for you to point out i had to be uneasy about the situation to post it as such. I guess at the time i was trying to convince myself it was an alright way to go about it as he did and that others do it to, but i know when it comes down to it if it doesn't feel right to me then it isn't right to me and that is what matters the most. I do love reading everyones responses. thanks everyone