My Master and i have recently started our Dom/sub relationship. I knew it would obviously be a growing and learning experience for us both and there was a LOT of talking and discussing before any play was involved. One thing i was not prepared for was this, and i have never been in a situation like this and my question is if this is a method used often? We established a safe word and all that good stuff, and then more of the "play" situations started, (sorry i am dragging this out, it is hard to put express for some reason), and he knows i do not like my face slapped hard, a few light play smacks i am all for but not rough and that was clear, so i was a little shocked when he started slapping my face, like really hard, and i was standing there thinking 'ok, he is testing my limits, suck it up, he will stop soon, he knows you don't like this, deal with it, it will stop soon....' and then i ended up twisting my body around to get away from his hand, so he twisted me back and got mad i moved away and started slapping me harder until i started bawling. When i started crying he stopped and hugged me and asked me why i didn't use my safe word. i was very confused, and still am by it, after i calmed down we talked and he said he was doing it in hopes that i would use my safe word, he said he doesn't want me in pain like that during play but he needs to know how far he can take it by pushing me at first and making me use my safe word. Now i don't know if it is just me, i think a safe word (or sign) is a GREAT thing and is critical to have established and trusted, but with that i do feel bad when i use it, just kind of like admitting i couldn't handle it (which i know is ok and can prevent bad things), but also sort of angry i had to use it, more angry at him, like i feel like he is "forcing" me to use it which just doesn't feel good. And more so the whole now knowing he does want to push me to the point i need to use it, and he seems confused why i don't use it more freely. So i am wondering if his strategy is used by others and what others think of it. Sorry, i know i might not have made a lot of sense and just went on and on..... it is confusing in my head and even harder to make sense in words. But i really look forward to hearing responses. thanks