John: you needn't think I haven't heard some of those arguments before. The point I'm making isn't that gay men (or a lesbian couple) would be the wrong kind of parents, only that international adoption is, now and in the near future, the wrong way to arrange that. And well, full adoption of non-relative kids within one rich country hardly exists anymore. (I'm totally okay with insemination, while surrogate mothering has special problems)

Besides, I don't think you can compete in being a good parent. The point of my argument is about not putting the adopted child, who's already had a difficult first few years, in a too vulnerable position.