For me its not about expectations, it is just about learning.

When I was first starting to get interested in the lifestyle I thought it was all about harsh punishments and being kept in cages. It was a gradual process to discover the truth.

I learned that this can be whatever we want it to be. People who talk about rules and "real" Doms and subs are full of crap. The lifestyle is not "one size fits all".

I learned that I don't have to give anything up. One of the first things I read was an essay by a slave going on about how much she had to give up (like listening to her favourite music) and warning girls to be sure before they entered the lifestyle. That was really full of crap too.

D/s doesn't take anything away from my life... it just adds to it.