Heh heh heh, clearly I'm quite dull as my safeword is simply "stop." Communication is very good between J-Go and myself during a session so I've never had to use the word as an actual sefety measure, but I'm still glad we have one -- circumstances in how one feels physically or even mentally can chinge in a split second in an intense session and a safeword is one more way to protect against something genuinely harmful taking place.

As for the second part of the question, Master and I are still quite new to The Lifestyle so the level of control He has in the relationship is still evolving. Simply, we're figuring out what works for us. Punishments vary as we experiment with different methods but, as others have said, the key is understanding what the punishment is for and proper corrective measures. There needs to be a split between what is metered out as punishment, and things you do for pleasure.