What makes you submissive?

[tydnchaynz{NSXX}]

It is also fairly common, I've noticed, that many submissives have positions of authority in their workplace and I'm no different - I've been running and managing companies most of my professional life, although with a soft approach as opposed to any 'hard as balls' dominant one lol and yes, I've been quite successful for those companies I have grown. Maybe this is a more prevalent commonality among us subs than the abuse one?

Submissives, when recognized by skilled abusers, are a direct target - I have learned that much - it is written on our person somehow and it can get taken advantage of when spotted. I've also learned how to read their 'writing' in return *winks* and it helps in preventing them ever abusing me again. It isn't without backlash though and when they see they can't take advantage, a very angry and accusing person appears lol

Gem.......i have noticed this as well. Personally, i've been in critical care nursing for ten years, and i have been on my own since the age of 16. i tend to agree that between the demanding and consistantly stressful aspects of my job, and a long life of HAVING to take care of myself, the psychological aspect of turning that control over to someone who loves, respects, and has nothing but your best interests at heart is a HUGE part of my submissive personality.

As for having targets painted on our backs by skilled abusers, i find that also to be true. As most of you have posted, most of my bondage and forced sex fantasies appeared long before my actual abuse. However, before i was aware of BDSM, i had no name for the way i felt. It did seem that the men that i attracted were all abusers in some form or another. And as has also been mentioned, it tended to make me much less submissive and with that tough girl *no one is ever going to hurt me again* attitude. Of course, this just tends to make me very lonely at times and hurts no one but myself, lol.

When i first stumbled into the world of BDSM, my first thought is "Wow! I'm home." Finally, there was a way to express myself AND other people out there that feel the same way that i do that i can talk to. Since then, i've learned a great deal about myself, and as gem also said, i can spot an abuser a mile away. i have also found out, that in a trusting, safe, and consensual relationship....i like being hurt just a lil' *grins*

As is the case in the world, people are just different. What *causes* someone to be submissive or Dominant??? Who knows. What is nice is that there are places where someone can find other people that have shared in their experiences, whatever they may be, and can offer advice or perhaps just a sympathetic ear in times of need.

Gem.....thanks for the link. And thanks to everyone else for their insight and opinions.

[gemmy]

As is the case in the world, people are just different. What *causes* someone to be submissive or Dominant??? Who knows. What is nice is that there are places where someone can find other people that have shared in their experiences, whatever they may be, and can offer advice or perhaps just a sympathetic ear in times of need.

Well said hun and I'm happy to hear you are taking the time to learn about yourself - truly it does go a long way in finding the One for you