How to find a master?

[icey]

lol^ i just splurted coffee through my already runny nose! gives a whole new meaning to the words hotstuff...your fault mastersgem

ive nothing much to add different from everyone else really other than be patient, if you're putting a profile anywhere keep it simple,clear and honest dont make the mistake some do and 'spice' it up that only caues misunderstandings and be prepared to sort the wheat from the chafe...especially if you join sites such as collarme or alt.com.

good luck

[sea lion]

As odd as it sounds, I've always found my subs when I wasn't looking for them. Innocent postings on Craigslist (platonic) asking to discuss BDSM, or even just to chat and pass the time, often incredibly led to the realization that we both shared many common interests. It seems if you are specifically looking for a sub you are immediately competing with a hundred other "doms" who all know the most impressive lingo imaginable......

[gemmy]

As odd as it sounds, I've always found my subs when I wasn't looking for them. Innocent postings on Craigslist (platonic) asking to discuss BDSM, or even just to chat and pass the time, often incredibly led to the realization that we both shared many common interests. It seems if you are specifically looking for a sub you are immediately competing with a hundred other "doms" who all know the most impressive lingo imaginable......

Except that the Dom's are on the winning side with a ratio of about 10subs for every Dom - not much of a competition for you guys but for us subs, it's hell haha!

[Guest011909]

What do you mean by "spicing it up"?

[Guest011909]

lol^ i just splurted coffee through my already runny nose! gives a whole new meaning to the words hotstuff...your fault mastersgem

ive nothing much to add different from everyone else really other than be patient, if you're putting a profile anywhere keep it simple,clear and honest dont make the mistake some do and 'spice' it up that only caues misunderstandings and be prepared to sort the wheat from the chafe...especially if you join sites such as collarme or alt.com.

good luck

What do you mean by "spicing it up"?

[icey]

people sometimes make the mistake of exaggerating their profiles a little, pretending an interest or even experience in something they dont have...say for eg bondage,flogging (whatever really) because they worry that if they dont appear to have some experience, knowledge that people wont take them seriously or feel naive.

and people sometimes think that they SHOULD have or show interests in certain activitys like it goes with the territory or something.

[Tojo]

Geez I wouldn't mind a dollar for every time I've heard this- unfortunately it's not easy to find the right one, whether it's a Dom or sub.

There's no tried & true recipe, just be patient & don't look too hard, is about the best I can come up with.

[jeanne]

An observation:

I, too, have noticed that there seem to be many more subs than Doms here...yet I can enumerate at least 5 Doms I've become friends with over the past year who have specifically been looking for a sub and not finding one for themselves. My perception was always that they were tripping over subbies everywhere they turn! It seems that some of the ones who are seriously looking don't really advertise that fact because they don't want to deal with the onslaught of sorta-subs, wanna-bes, etc. So the advice above to just get to know people is correct. You'll find the one who's right for you by treating them as people first. And in the meantime...read as many posts by Doms here as you can. You'll sort out the wheat from the chaff, figure out which ones have something to say that you want to hear, and learn more about yourself along the way. Which is always a good thing.

And I know it's trite...but sometimes the connection with your future Dom comes right out of the blue. But by having read His writings beforehand...you'll know something about Him and who He is and how He thinks and goes about His 'domly' business.