i am bi polar. Even with the medications i am on i am not always stable. i have manic days( and nights) and days where i am so stuck inside myself with depression that i have a tendency to self harm( to which Master has put a stop to. It is unnacceptable to Him that i hurt myself.My well being is the most important thing. So far so good). It is a definite obstacle because sometimes i say things or act out when i am i my "moods" that normally would get my ass caned. Slowly Master is becoming more aware of when i am in a bad state of mind and He tends to put a halt to all activities and figure out what He can do to help me get in a better frame of mind. Sometimes we will talk for hours. If that doesn't work He usually suggests i call my doctor to get my meds adjusted. It has been a struggle as i have a lot of stress going on in my life that triggered some setbacks.
I also have anxiety disorder and panic attacks. So far i haven't "freaked" when we were playing, but i'm sure it will come up eventually. Master is aware and checks with me very often during play. I have become a bit nervous several times before we have played but not a full blown attack. Usually we talk it out and if He thinks it will harm my mental well being to continue we come to an immediate halt. I am on maintenance medication for that as well
Add to that, that i am claustophobic *sigh* We have been taking this verrry slow. As to the fact that neither one of us wants this to be an issue. I definitely dont want this to ruin our play because i love the idea of being tied up and helpless, but actually doing it is a very different thing. We are taking this in small steps.
i have ulcerative colitis as well, so anal play is pretty much a no-no. However we are learning that we can do mild play very occasionally( and gently)
He has been very wonderful in dealing with all of my problems. Master if you read this, words can't quite express how grateful i am that i found you(or you found me. lol)
I am a much more healthy, balanced, and genuinely happy person since meeting you. And we have such a damn good time too. hugs and kisses.