icey I completely understand...I have a borderline personality disorder...mine makes me one of the most self hating people I've ever met. I didn't worry about what other people really thought of me, since no one could have despised me as much as I did myself.
I was into self harm though in ways that most didn't imagine. I gained an excessive amount of weight (since lost but damage done), I distanced myself from friends/family, and knives were my friends. I also picked and ripped open any existing wound on my form just to make it worse.
There are times that I become agitated, moody and...well downright odd. I get this buzzing in my brain that won't go away, and sometimes I hear little voices telling me really horrible shit about myself. Even though I know the things they say aren't true, it's an incredible downer. Sir usually wraps me up and finds ways to make me focus or distract me from them when He sees it happening. Lately the little bastards have been having the gall to do it while He's at work, so I get to wait until He gets home to let it all out. I don't know if that's a form of schizophrenia or the personality disorder, but whichever it is...it's bothersome until I write or play.
I also have a terrible fear of choking, so hands around my neck send me into this...self defense fury. My collar isn't an issue, just hands. I'm also...ocd a little about germs...so I go overboard with cleaning myself especially certain times of the month. Sir has to remind me that he likes my smell...otherwise I think I'd be in the shower every five minutes trying to make myself smell like soap.

I'm sure I have more....I just can't think of what they are....I'm a smart ass....but I don't think that's a mental condition as much as it is a bonus to me getting my ass spanked. Hope this gave you some feedback