Yes, we CAN be strong and move on with our lives. We can learn to not allow our abusers to continue to have power over us. My own abuse was over a span of 10 years and ended 10 years ago. I'm also lucky to be alive, after a suicide attempt and a murder attempt upon me. And this was in a vanilla relationship. I think that if I had insisted upon making it a BDSM relationship (which I did consider for awhile) then I would be six feet under right now.

I probably should have gone to therapy for my abuse, but I chose to do what I have always done in a crisis. I chose to withdraw and focus on myself and my own survival and not to involve anyone else (my family would not have been there for me), though a couple of friends knew what I was going through. It was my Master who has helped me the most and has helped to heal me the most. I do still suffer from PTSD, nightmares, panic attacks, etc. But this time I am no longer alone and that really helps. And it also helps that this board is here with all the wonderful people whom I have been chatting with and posting with the past couple of months. Sometimes we all need someone to talk to, to listen to us, to help us find our way back to the light.