i think this is a wonderful idea...denu, you are such a thoughtful gal!

i must say, though, that i've seen issues arise in forums because of what we kindly refer to as trollers. We should have a system in place, and i do believe it should be a private forum. There should be a way to insure that abusers don't have this info at their beck and call. These trollers use the information to get into the chats, etc and bring great pain to those who have posted their innermost thoughts, fears, etc. i've seen this happen, and it's very traumatic when you're not expecting it and someone uses the story that bled from your heart to berate you. Of course, such a bastard would not be tolerated, however, the damage is already done...

Another advantage to the privacy idea is that we can all feel comfortable in the knolwedge that they can say whatever they wish, whatever they feel comfy in sharing and still be supported.

i know that most on this site would never do such awful things to us, but i also know that there are those who would reslish the opportunity.

If we could find a way to do this sort of thing, i would be willing to volunteer as someone to help monitor it.

This is how they did it on another forum and it worked out well, though it would need to be adjusted for our site, our use, and our ways...

1. They had separate men's and women's private forums. Men who have been abused generally don't want to talk about their experiences publicly, and i have noticed that with the exception of ashton (thanks btw hun for sharing), there are no men doing so here...though i understand that this thread is still very new. Some Women may not feel comfy sharing in front of men and vise/versa too...
2. If someone wanted to be admitted, they had to PM the owner of the site, with their real name and phone number-the name and number was used one time, to call and be sure that the person who answered was of the gender which they claimed, and to advise on the ways of that forum. This was to insure that there was no chance of a troller man to get into the women's private forum, etc....
3. It was a rule- whatever you wish to say, no matter what, as long as you're not criticizing anyone in there...be supportive in all posts when replying to someone else's thread.
4. Most importantly, what was said in the privacy of that forum and who goes there is never, ever discussed outside that forum. Of course, this didn't apply if you told your own story...but you couldn't mention others' stories, etc.

Some people aren't ready to make their experiences public, so those folks would not feel comfortable sharing in the main forums.

Also, since we have rooms in chat, we could have meetings to handle immediate needs, the idea being similar to a support group meeting in R/L.

As i said above, i am willing (chomping at the bit) to volunteer in whatever capacity in which i may be of service, and would like to ask miss denu to volunteer as well (teehee put ya on the spot), if we can get this off the ground.


xxxx stripey